The Alpha (eBook)

28th October 2001. X20 Broad leaf Ln Enfield, Connecticut

It is pouring, the raindrops slowly slide on the window. The little girl is making her homework in silence, at the desk. Near her, is a long shelf filled with sports medals and cups about junior Running Olympics and Leading team works. It's hers two years older brother's all. Yet downstairs, folding the clothes with the usual moves, the middle-aged woman hears the voice of her adolescent son. Again...

"You have to sign".

"Oh, my Lord, stop it. No." the woman growls.

"But I want to do this, Mum, and I have to start now, otherwise it'll be too late."

"What did I say? Stop this nonsense ", the woman turns to the teenager. He nervously drops the paper on the table.

"This nonsense would change my life," he says quietly.

"You're unbelievable, aren't you? I can't bear it, what the hell's the matter with you? You're a sharp student, a top athlete." She keeps folding the clothes. "It's probably a teenage hoard, as the EMO stage."

"It's not..." begins the teenager, but in response, his mother slaps the clothes away.

"Don't you get what I'm saying?!" they raise their voices at the same time, and the teenager's bony hands get firmly clenched in a fist. Bored, the father on the other sofa looks up from his laptop. He simply glances at the arguing couple again. "What kind of example are you showing to your sister?" continues the woman, "You can't be so irresponsible!"

The adolescent doesn't answer and growls under his nose.

"Me, irresponsible?"

"Andrew, to your room." says the man, and the boy bows his head, the brown hair covering his scowling face, and turns away from his angry mother, holding back his cries in obedience to the command. 

Silence. It is 4 am. when the braided-haired girl opens her eyes. The bed next to her is empty. She hurries to the bathroom and knocks.

"I have to do it too," she says softly, but there's no answer. Only the golden light shines out from under the door. "Andy, are you still in there?" she asks loudly knocking again, but nothing. "I'm going to pee myself!" she knocks on the door, but still nothing. Hurrying inside, she freezes. "ANDY!" she shouts, rushing towards the teenager on the white tiles. "WAKE UP, YOU HEAR ME?" she cries, but the teenager doesn't move to his sister's shrieking voice. Not even when frightened, she staggers to his side and grabs his face. "My God, you're so cold. No, no, no! Dad, help!" the girl screams, and with trembling hands, she caresses her brother's face, but in vain. "DAD!"

The tiny fingers grow pale as they cross each other. "God, I am begging you... I beg you... I swear my life I won't let him do wrong. I promise, whatever happens, I'll be there... and I'll take care of him... Just please... please forgive him for what he tried to do... Please...."

"You are silly" hears the timid voice of the boy and lifts her face from the white blanket.

"I know, I have faith enough for you too..." she smiles, but his brother turns away from her.

"I want to die..."

"I won't let you!" grabs the girl his face. "You hear me? No matter what mum says, we will do it together, okay?" she looks at the rosy face. "I will help you get through this... from now... till the perfect end."

13th of September 2010. New York, National Library.

A young girl in skinny jeans and a red sweater stands in front of the books. The book she's looking for is on the last shelf, but she can't reach it. Sighing, she looks around for help. After a few steps, her gaze catches a tall student reading a large book and taking notes on a laptop.

"Handsome," she shrugs his shoulders abruptly. "Come on, help me". The student looks up at her.

"I know you?"

"Adriana." She holds out her hand.

"Ira."

"Now help me." she smiles, and he stands up. "You're tall." she laughs.

"Yes, I am." comes a kind smile in response. "So which book?"

"That one, there," the girl points to "the red one". As the young man takes out the book, he reads the title: W. Stekel: Sadism and Masochism "The Psychology of Hate and Cruelty."

"Really? You read this?" he looks at her, but she grins and takes the book from his hand.

"I need it for my dissertation.''

22nd of September 2010. New York, National Library.

The young girl smiles at the man reading in his usual spot. "Put it back," she says, as the man looks up from his book.

"Nice to see you again," he grins wearily. She hands him the red book. "Have you finished already?"

"I'm a fast reader," she smiles.

"Next book?" he asks with a grin.

"That" the girl points to an old gray book. "It's annoying that all these books are on the last shelf."

"It would be bad if anyone could read them, I think...." He reaches for the book and reads the title again: Desire and Jouissance in the Teachings of LACAN. "What is Jouissance?"

"Oh," she grins and takes the book from him. "Well, jouissance compels the submissive to constantly try to transcend the prohibitions imposed on his pleasure, to go beyond the principle of pleasure".

Silence. The guy stares into the dark eyes, then starts laughing.

"Okay... Don't talk about this to my fiancee."

"No, you want to get married?" she smiles.

"Sure" comes the straight answer. "Next week."

"That's bad..." says the girl, stepping closer.

"No, it's not. I love her." he backs a step.

"Really?" the girl asks seriously.

"Of course I love her."

"Yeah, what's sex like with her?"

"None of your business?" he's annoyed, but she smiles.

"I can read you."

"Please don't" he turns back to his desk and closes the book. At the title, she laughs.

"So, lawyer.."

"Stop!" A strong voice and she looks at him with piercing dark eyes. "You're starting to cross the line." Silence again. She takes a deep breath. "You don't know anything about me, what you read is the first impression. Don't judge by words."

"I don't do that."

"Yes, you do." He closes his laptop. "You try to manipulate whoever you want. The fact that I answered you isn't because I don't see what you're doing, it's only good manners." He steps closer to her and looks deep into her dark eyes, and rosy cheeks. "I feel it too. You're sexy and beautiful, but I love someone and I know what loyalty means. So don't try to seduce me." She tilts her head to the side, smiling.

"Wow... I like you." she holds out her hand again. "Friends then?''

Five years later...

Chat open:

S.A: Hi handsome. :) Still, happily, married?

I.G: Yes.

S.A: Nice, so they haven't awakened yet...

I.G.:?

S.A: I need your support. 

I.G: You killed someone? 

S.A: Noooo.... :))) Paperwork.

I.G: I don't interfere with parking bills.

S.A: Man. I need a legal backup for the club.

I.G:?

27th April 2015, MTF Headquarters, San Francisco

"How can I be so feeble? Why is it so tough for me to make this decision?" The beautiful young woman looks nervously out the vast window, her long eyelashes flicking tears from her blue eyes.

"Relax..." sounds the soft voice, and the small hand slips gently into her hand. "It is a decision that will alter everything. There are tough situations in life when deciding requires a great deal of bravery to face the unforeseeable outcomes. It's like loving and trusting someone."

The blonde woman thoughtfully turns to her sister.

"I thought love was a matter of chemistry, not a decision!"

Her sister giggles.

"Aside from that, what is basic, to love and trust is a decision. The decision, like anything involving people. One day you will know. Some decisions can seem difficult, like this one, with so much to take into account. You are never prepared for everything, and only when you accept the outcome of your decisions and are fully able to deal with them will you discover how strong you are. That's what this is about. There is time, you must not rush, the Doctor also said. Once you can see clearly, it will be easy to make the decision, albeit fearfully. You'll know that the risks are worth the results. By the way... To love yourself is as important a choice as to love somebody else. It's very difficult to control these situations..." The woman curls her lips into a small smile when her sister pats her hand. "I can already imagine it! My perfect sister with her flawless curls, in a gorgeous white dress, walking on the golden beach with a shy smile, with mister perfect Antonio Banderas."

"Oh my God, Becca! Stop it!" she laughs.

"No, no, no..." laughs her sister. "I can see the breeze making your dress dance like a Greek goddess's..." she points. "HM. Don't you like Banderas? A Clooney would suit you better, you're right!"

"Becca! You're an idiot!" she laughs out loud.

"Too old for you?" 

"Stop it!"

"Okay, well... I'm sure your Mr. Perfect has to be older than you. How did the job interview go then?" The brunette stands up.

"I'm still waiting," sighs the blonde as she picks up her bag.

"Like what?"

"Prosecutor," comes the quiet reply. "I don't know if I want to work there anymore... The beginners have pimped out every time... New York! Here comes the blonde from no man's land, with her fresh degree..." she opens the door.

"This blonde is an intelligent and elegant woman. What did they say?" asks her sister.

"They will call again... They've been calling...