Gail Can you feel that?

The vibrations. There must be an underground line here.

I think I’ll have another glass of rosé. Shall we get a bottle?

Will you have some?

Okay. Good.

No? Okay. I can get through a bottle … if we’re eating.

Ken Eating would be good.

Gail Actually I’m not sure … Maybe I’m not hungry.

Ken No?

Gail No … I’ll have a drink and then I think I might go.

Ken You’re going because …?

Gail You were late. And you’ve had a few drinks.

Ken Two. Two pints. And a shot. She’s bringing coffee. Okay?

I’m sorry. Stay. It’ll be fun.

Gail I’ll have another glass of wine.

Ken Exactly. Catch up.

Gail I didn’t think it was a race.

Ken Why are so many Indian restaurants pink?

In Denmark there’s a TV show where two people meet for the first time and on the same day they get married.

Gail She’s disappeared. I’m going to have a smoke.

Ken You won’t come back.

Gail Yes, I will.

Ken Leave something here so you’ll come back.

Gail What, like a shoe?

Ken Your purse.

Gail This isn’t a hostage situation.

Ken No, it’s a date. It’s great.

Gail Do the couples get paid?

Ken Which couples?

Gail The ones on the show. Who meet and marry. Or do they just want to be on TV?

Ken No, they genuinely want a husband or wife. It’s called Marriage at First Sight.

Then they follow their progress.

I had a Danish girlfriend. Divorce is very easy there. You can do it online.

Ken Tell me about your work …

Gail It’s my night off.

Ken Thank you.

Gail For what?

Ken For staying. What are you going to eat? Chicken?

Gail I’m a vegetarian.

Ken That’s okay.

Gail I know it is.

Ken Fish?

Gail No.

Ken That’s fine. A lot of vegetarians don’t eat fish.

Gail Real vegetarians don’t eat fish. Or meat. They don’t eat it.

Ken But those fish oils. They’ll keep you going. Your brain. Your knee joints. Depression. How can you do without them? You’re okay. You look strong and healthy.

Gail Do you want to inspect my teeth?

Ken So … I’m just out of a car crash of a marriage … You work in a law centre, yeah? And you’re …?

Gail A vegetarian. I know. It’s a lot to take in.

Ken I’m a good dancer. I bet you’re a good dancer.

Gail I am.

Ken We should ask them to put some music on. Stop talking. Start dancing.

Gail and Ken get up and dance to a great Motown number for a few moments. They dance fantastically together. Then they sit back down.

Ken You don’t have children?

Gail No. I’ve never had the time.

Ken See. We’re doing okay. This is a pretty good level of talk. Don’t you think? It’s like a good marriage-level sort of conversation. Convivial.

Gail I’ve never been married.

Ken Impressive. I liked your write-up. You sounded very … optimistic.

Gail No. I’m not.

Ken You are. Compared to the people I know. You wrote about justice.

Gail Really? I must have had too much red wine before I filled it in.

Waitress Are you ready to order?

Ken A new head. A new body. And a new life, please. And Rachel would like a new soul mate.

Gail We might just stick with drinks.

Waitress You have to eat. Sorry. It’s a legal thing.

Ken See? And you’re a lawyer.

Gail Come back to us, yes?

Waitress Okay. We’ve got some specials there.

Ken Specials. Good. You should be in films, you know, not carrying trays around? Shouldn’t she?

Gail What?

Ken Be in a film. Or modelling something. No?

Gail I’m going to have a fag.

Ken Have you always smoked?

Gail I wasn’t born smoking, no. My name’s Gail. Not Rachel.

Ken You lied to me.

Gail I didn’t. I’ve never said my name was Rachel.

Ken When I came in I called you Rachel.

Gail Yes. And I let it go.

Ken Okay … Take two. Ken and Gail meet. How is it for you?

Gail This? Well … it’s not great, Ken.

Ken Tell me about your cases.

Gail No. We’re like doctors. Confidential.

Ken I’m not asking for names. Do you cover family law?

Gail No. I studied it. But we do mainly housing and immigration.

Ken Do you remember your studies?

Gail Vaguely. Do you?

Ken No. So what’s the centre like?

Gail There’s a lot of disappointment in one small building. A few successes too. Right … cigarettes.

Do you? Smoke?

Ken Me yes. I smoke … I drink … I vape … I chew Nicorette … I do dope … coke … Berocca … Red Bull … Smarties … I do everything. I’m terrible.

Gail Will you join me then?

Ken Let’s order first. So you like it? The law?

Gail I’m probably addicted to it.

Ken The adrenalin?

Gail Hope. I’ve become expert at adjusting people’s expectations. I can’t stand that the law is seen as something foreign. It should be taught in schools. Your rights. Just like English and French is.

Ken So you don’t get parents coming in? Families?

Gail No. What do you do?

Ken Nothing right now.

Why did you go into law?

Gail I can’t remember. What did you do then?

Ken Secret.

Gail You’re not going to remember any of this tomorrow, are you?

Ken I will. Your face.

Gail No. I’m probably having a conversation with myself essentially.

Ken You’re not. It’s complicated, isn’t it? The whole thing of … people.

Gail It’s been a while.

Ken Are you still capable of giving yourself to someone?

Gail Is that the transaction? It sounds pretty dramatic.

Ken Really? I think it sounds warm … comforting. Sexy.

Gail I’ve probably found myself lonelier with someone than...