SHIFTING Bravely (eBook)

A Path to Growth, Healing, and Transformation

(Autor)

eBook Download: EPUB
2022
184 Seiten
Loving Healing Press (Verlag)
978-1-61599-630-8 (ISBN)

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SHIFTING Bravely - Holli Kenley
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Get Ready to Make Your Own SHIFT!



  • Are you feeling stuck, stagnant, or unsettled in your current reality?
  • Are discomfort, dissatisfaction, and dis-ease ongoing themes in your life?
  • Are you longing for healthy change, first with yourself and then with others?

Seeds of change lie dormant within. Even more than you can imagine will grow there if given a chance.
'SHIFTING Bravely is a beautifully written, easy to digest invitation and guide for personal growth, filled with illustrations of how those who gave themselves permission to heal deeply buried wounds were able to step into their real story and create powerfully grounded energy for profound, untethered life-long change.'
--Debra Rock, MSW, LCSW, psychotherapist in private practice
'Filled with real-life stories, practical tools and reflections, Kenley's words seemed to sing right off the page and land directly into my heart. Beautifully weaved tapestry of wisdom and inspiration! A must-read for anyone who is desiring personal freedom.'
--Shari Alyse 'Joy Magnet', bestselling author and motivational speaker
'SHIFTING Bravely brilliantly describes the phases of personal metamorphosis and offers profound insight, concrete information and practical tools and exercises to skillfully and lovingly navigate the journey into oneself.'
--Marcie R. Elias, JD, MA, organizational psychologist
'A deep reflection of the unhealed elements in our lives, SHIFTING Bravely is a journey of growth that invites the reader to be vulnerable, open, and courageous.'
--Allison Sucamele, PsyD, adjunct professor, department of Education and Psychology, course lead positive psychology, Pepperdine University
'SHIFTING Bravely is quite literally a life-changing book.'
--Kiersten Hathcock, author Little Voices, CEO Mod Mom Furniture


Get Ready to Make Your Own SHIFT! Are you feeling stuck, stagnant, or unsettled in your current reality? Are discomfort, dissatisfaction, and dis-ease ongoing themes in your life? Are you longing for healthy change, first with yourself and then with others? Seeds of change lie dormant within. Even more than you can imagine will grow there if given a chance. "e;SHIFTING Bravely is a beautifully written, easy to digest invitation and guide for personal growth, filled with illustrations of how those who gave themselves permission to heal deeply buried wounds were able to step into their real story and create powerfully grounded energy for profound, untethered life-long change."e; --Debra Rock, MSW, LCSW, psychotherapist in private practice "e;Filled with real-life stories, practical tools and reflections, Kenley's words seemed to sing right off the page and land directly into my heart. Beautifully weaved tapestry of wisdom and inspiration! A must-read for anyone who is desiring personal freedom."e; --Shari Alyse 'Joy Magnet', bestselling author and motivational speaker "e;SHIFTING Bravely brilliantly describes the phases of personal metamorphosis and offers profound insight, concrete information and practical tools and exercises to skillfully and lovingly navigate the journey into oneself."e; --Marcie R. Elias, JD, MA, organizational psychologist "e;A deep reflection of the unhealed elements in our lives, SHIFTING Bravely is a journey of growth that invites the reader to be vulnerable, open, and courageous."e; --Allison Sucamele, PsyD, adjunct professor, department of Education and Psychology, course lead positive psychology, Pepperdine University "e;SHIFTING Bravely is quite literally a life-changing book."e; --Kiersten Hathcock, author Little Voices, CEO Mod Mom Furniture

1

A SHIFT Lies Dormant

“Every person has seeds of greatness within, even though they may currently be dormant.”

John C. Maxwell

Shifting is a process of growth. Its genesis—seeds. Remarkably, we carry them within us. How is it we do not know of their existence? What is it we are doing or not doing that contributes to their dormancy? What is behind this mystery?

As we explore why our seeds “may currently be dormant,” we begin by understanding there is no deficiency within the seeds themselves. Nor is it a fault of our own, or not noticing them, or not searching hard enough. The awareness to do so is simply not available to us. It is important to embrace this truth.

We are shielded from dormant seeds by various forms of camouflage—disruptions and diversions which consume us and often control the course of our lives.

Forms of camouflage are deceptive. Their presence often appears to provide us with opportunities for growth or change, at least in self-satisfying or superficial ways. On closer examination, forms of camouflage typically limit our growth, conforming us to patterns of survival, some beneficial and some not. In order to begin the process of acknowledging sleepy seeds and of discerning their presence, we must familiarize ourselves with the most prevalent forms of camouflage. Only then can we understand the concept of SHIFTING Bravely and begin our journey through a seasonal process of self-growth.

One common form of camouflage is stagnation and settling. Many of us have come to accept that getting by is good enough, even if we feel stuck or unsatisfied. Others of us, who know we are not living up to our potential or pursuing our dreams, feel trapped and resigned to predetermined destinies. Day after day, our growth is stunted by settling for a degree of security and stagnating in mundane routines. How does this happen?

Because diverse internal and external sources of influence shape our developmental years as well as our own choices, we enter into young adult years with perceptions and expectations regarding self-efficacy. Some of us view ourselves as independent, free to choose what we want for ourselves and our lives. Others of us may feel obligated, or in many cases, bound or oppressed by our circumstances, forcing us to settle for something we do not want.

Stagnation and settling shroud our thinking with self-doubt and self-blame. More importantly, over time and with repetition of behavioral patterns, these agents of camouflage condition us into believing we don’t deserve anything more, anything better, or different. Or perhaps on some level, we convince ourselves we should be grateful for what we have and what we know.

From the many stories I received regarding “A SHIFT in My Life,” let’s begin with Robert’s experience. His words convey the dormant nature of his seeds, settling for what he was taught and feeling resigned with the status quo—securing a future for himself.

In 1951, my folks bought an old estate near Denver. I was twelve years old. From that time, until I was twenty-eight, my family focused on building and operating a small family country club on that property. Everyone involved assumed I would eventually take over the business. I was involved in every aspect of building, maintenance, working with the public, lifeguarding, promoting, and in fact every facet of the business and its future development.

Finishing high school in 1957, I was urged to go on to college and get a teaching certificate. In 1961, I added teaching high school to my life. I found teaching to be a real challenge and joy but was committed to building the club and becoming economically independent. The school schedule complimented my summer obligations. In the early 60s, I began designing and promoting a year-round club.

I was also involved with forming several marketing enterprises. I worked 24/7 365 days a year. Fully engaged in that life, I was sure my future was secure.

Robert accomplished what was expected of him. His loyalty to his family and to the business rewarded him financially. Although settling and stagnation served him well for a period of time, the seeds of a more fulfilling dream lay dormant under layers of monetary success. In Robert's words, “I added teaching high school to my life. I found teaching to be a real challenge and joy but was committed to building the club and becoming economically independent.”

Another form of camouflage that presents itself in countless individuals is psychological pain. Some of the most common disorders such as anxiety, depression, Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), and behavioral / substance addiction wreak havoc with our lives. Their causes are complex and complicated. Their symptoms can be chronic and debilitating. When they are unattended or when denial prevents their acknowledgement, we are held hostage to their manifestations. And thus, disturbance determines our destiny, shutting out other pathways to growth.

When disorders are diagnosed and addressed, effective psychological interventions as well as medical treatments require compliance and commitment, focusing our energies and resources on symptom reduction and management. This is as it should be. Our mental health must remain a priority. Therefore, it is understandable why dormant seeds of change remain in their states of hibernation, as individuals courageously explore their roots of pain and embrace their recovering journeys.

From her story, “A SHIFT In My Life,” Annika’s words speak to this form of camouflage.

Back in December of 2010, I somehow was brought to my knees and surrendered to my alcoholism. I went into treatment in Eugene, Oregon, for only twenty-one days. At the time I went into treatment, I was forty-four years old. I had managed to destroy my marriage, relationships, trust, and all of my self-worth and dignity.

When I got out of treatment, I had nothing to go home to. No house, no car, and even my kids didn’t like me. I lived in Oregon and was actually shunned by my community due to my behavior while I was drinking…it was bad. I don’t blame anyone.

I ended up getting a job in [the field of] sobriety. They call that first recovery job “a get-well job.” I worked as many hours as possible while attending intensive outpatient treatment.

As Annika’s story illustrates, her addiction to alcohol impacted her psychological and relational health. Making her recovery a priority, she focused her energies on a twenty-one-day treatment program. Thus, during periods of camouflage requiring rigorous focus and concentrated investment into recovery, the cultivation of an awareness of seeds within dormant states can be stymied, or as in Annika’s case, it can be redirected towards self-care.

Often psychological disturbance is accompanied with physiological disease. Or vice-versa. Either way, disease of any kind, especially if it is chronic in nature, requires tremendous investment into our healing. And thus, just as with psychological disturbance, there may be periods of time in our lives where our physical health dictates our path and our priorities. This type of camouflage takes on a protective role of sorts, unintentionally helping us by redirecting our attention away from dormant seeds. Our bodies and minds are in weakened states, calling on us to pay attention to them.

Dedicated educator Britt describes in her story, “A SHIFT In My Life,” how illness caught her off guard, redirecting her energies from her beloved work as she began searching for causes and exploring treatments. Remarkably, as Britt tended to her physiological disease, she began to unearth dormant seeds nestled beneath her layers of camouflage.

As I moved through my twenties and thirties many good things came my way. I was happily married to my life partner and together we built one of the pre-eminent archaeological education and research centers in the nation. My husband and I worked hard, dreamed large, and were wildly successful. For all its rewards, the work was exhausting and not without a constant stream of crises and stress.

After our two sons were born, we retired from our position of leadership at the education center we had created. It seemed creating schools was in our blood. By the time our sons were four and six, we moved to Arizona to take care of my husband’s parents. We soon became involved in the charter school movement and successfully created the second charter school in the state—an exportable model on the forefront of education. I was in my mid-forties by this time, raising two sons, working…trying to juggle it all.

Around this time, much to my amazement, I discovered I had developed significant gut issues which required treatment—potentially Crohn’s disease they said. It can be a nasty one. I was taken by surprise. I had always been physically strong and rarely sick with anything. I began to focus on the reasons why my gut was crying out to get my attention. I ended up following a comprehensive three-pronged approach.

As Britt’s story portrays, it is important to note that psychological disorders or physiological diseases can be the impetus for uncovering layers of camouflage as individuals begin to question the challenges they face and search for trusted direction and tested remedies. However, it has been my experience with most individuals who are in the midst of life-threatening storms, it is critical to channel their energies on...

Erscheint lt. Verlag 1.1.2022
Sprache englisch
Themenwelt Sachbuch/Ratgeber Gesundheit / Leben / Psychologie Familie / Erziehung
Sachbuch/Ratgeber Gesundheit / Leben / Psychologie Lebenshilfe / Lebensführung
Sachbuch/Ratgeber Gesundheit / Leben / Psychologie Psychologie
Geisteswissenschaften Psychologie Persönlichkeitsstörungen
Geisteswissenschaften Psychologie Sucht / Drogen
Schlagworte Abuse • Adult Children of Substance Abusers • Codependency • Self-Help
ISBN-10 1-61599-630-3 / 1615996303
ISBN-13 978-1-61599-630-8 / 9781615996308
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