Life and How to Live It

What constitutes a good doctor? What makes someone healing? Research consistently shows that the personal attributes and style of the therapist are more important than the type of therapy they use to help people get better. Among the characteristics of these healers are empathy, genuineness, warmth and an ability to listen. But, there’s more. What do patients give their doctor? This book looks at the influence a lifetime of patients has had on retired consultant psychiatrist Dr Tim Cantopher. It explores the profound, often moving, inter-relation between `healer’ and `wounded’, and examines how the two may overlap sometimes more than might be expected. Topics include:

how to really listen and stay with a person's distress
the meaning of the word `patient?’
the need for resilience
why honesty is a pre-requisite for recovery
the doctor’s expectations, and why they should be challenged
the healing value of warm, supportive communication
how to respond in a way which shows that they have heard and understood the issue which has been shared
last but not least, the need for humour!

Dr Tim Cantopher says: `So many of us, not just professional therapists, want to fix things. We also want to fix people, so when distress is shared with us, we want to deliver advice which will make things better. In fact, what is often needed is not solutions, but a sharing of the feelings, someone being there and tolerating the sadness without swatting it away with trite advice. Warm, supportive communication heals people.’