Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist (eBook)
190 Seiten
Rowman & Littlefield Publishers (Verlag)
978-1-4422-2019-5 (ISBN)
People with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorders have a serious mental illness that primarily affects their intimate, personal, and family relationships. Often they appear to be normally functioning at work and in public interactions, and Narcissists may even be highly effective, in the short term, in some work or social situations. However, in intimate relationships, they can be emotional, aggressive, demeaning, illogical, paranoid, accusing, and controllingin the extreme. Their ability to function normally or pleasantly can suddenly change in an instant, like flipping a switch. These negative behaviors don't happen once in a while, they happen almost continuously in their intimate relationships and most often, and especially with their Caretaker family member.Here, Margalis Fjelstad describes how people get into a Caretaker role with a Borderline or Narcissist, and how they can get out. Caretakers give up their sense of self to become who and what the Borderline or Narcissist needs them to be. This compromises the Caretaker's self-esteem, distorts their thinking processes, and locks them into a Victim-Persecutor-Rescuer pattern with the Borderline or Narcissist. The book looks at the underlying rules and expectations in these relationships and shows Caretaker's how to move themselves out of these rigid interactions and into a healthier, more productive, and positive lifestylewith or without the Borderline/Narcissistic partner or family member. It describes how to get out of destructive interactions with the Borderline or Narcissist and how to take new, more effective actions to focus on personal wants, needs, and life goals while allowing the Borderline or Narcissist to take care of themselves. It presents a realistic, yet compassionate, attitude toward the self-destructive nature of these relationships, and gives real life examples of how individuals have let go of their Caretaker behaviors with creative and effective solutions.
Margalis Fjelstad, PhD, LMFT, has a private psychotherapy practice in Ft. Collins, CO, specializing in work with clients who are in relationship to someone who has borderline or narcissistic personality disorder, and she facilitates groups on Caretaker recovery. She has previously been an Adjunct Faculty member at Regis University in Colorado Springs and at California State University in Sacramento.
PART I: UNDERSTANDING THE CARETAKER ROLEINTRODUCTION: HOW CAN I TELL IF I’M A CARETAKER?1: IS MY PARTNER REALLY A BORDERLINE OR NARCISSIST?2: WHY THE BORDERLINE/NARCISSIST NEEDS A CARETAKER3: LEARNING TO BE A CARETAKER4: CARETAKING INVOLVEMENT LEVELS5: EMOTIONAL DISTORTIONS OF CARETAKERS6: THOUGHT DISTORTIONS OF CARETAKERS7: BEHAVIORAL DISTORTIONS OF CARETAKERS8: DISTORTIONS IN THE SENSE OF SELF9: RELATIONSHIP DISTORTIONS OF CARETAKERS PART II: LETTING GO OF CARETAKINGINTRODUCTION: HOW DO I MAKE CHANGES?10: STAGES OF HEALING11: CHALLENGING THE BP/NP FAMILY RULES12: BEGINNING TO HEAL: EMBRACING NEW BELIEFS AND BEHAVIORS13: INCREASING YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE14: NURTURING AND CARING FOR YOURSELF15: ANXIETY REDUCING SKILLS WITH THE BP/NP16: CHANGE CREATING SKILLS WITH THE BP/NP17: LEAVING OR STAYING PART III – REBUILDINGINTRODUCTION: HOW DOES IT LOOK TO NOT BE A CARETAKER?18: MOVING FORWARD IN A HEALTHY WAY19: REACHING OUT TO OTHERS20: THE NEW YOU APPENDIX I: CARETAKER TESTBIBLIOGRAPHY
Erscheint lt. Verlag | 7.2.2013 |
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Sprache | englisch |
Themenwelt | Sachbuch/Ratgeber ► Gesundheit / Leben / Psychologie ► Krankheiten / Heilverfahren |
Sachbuch/Ratgeber ► Gesundheit / Leben / Psychologie ► Lebenshilfe / Lebensführung | |
Schulbuch / Wörterbuch ► Lexikon / Chroniken | |
Geisteswissenschaften ► Psychologie ► Persönlichkeitsstörungen | |
Schlagworte | a borderline narcissist • a borderline personality disorder • a narcissistic personality • borderline and bipolar • borderline and narcissist • borderline behavior • borderline personalities • borderline personality traits • caregiver depression • care giving • Caregiving • caregiving and dementia books • caregiving books • caregiving dementia • caregiving for alzheimers • caregiving how to hold on while letting go • caregiving the good the bad and the blessings • caregiving the spiritual journey of love loss and renewal • caregiving wife's handbook • caregiving without regrets • care taking • Caretaking • caretaking aging parents • caretaking and caregiving • caretaking a new soul • caretaking behavior • care taking behaviour • caretaking codependency • caretaking elderly parents • care taking environment • caretaking for elderly parents • caretaking in relationships • caretaking parents • caretaking responsibilities • elderly care taking • emotional caretaking • narcissism and bipolar • narcissism books • narcissism borderline • narcissism codependency • narcissism psychology • narcissism traits • Personalitites • Personality disorder • personality disorder causes • Psychology/ Personalities • rethinking narcissism by dr. craig malkin |
ISBN-10 | 1-4422-2019-8 / 1442220198 |
ISBN-13 | 978-1-4422-2019-5 / 9781442220195 |
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