Art of Persuasion (Collection), The

<> Richard Templar is an astute observer of human behavior and understands what makes the difference between those of us who effortlessly glide toward success and those of us who struggle against the tide. He has distilled these observations into his Rules titles. More than 1.3 million people around the world have enjoyed and now play by Richard Templar’s Rules.   Jonathan Herring understands the components of a good argument. He is a lawyer and eminent legal academic (at Exeter College of Oxford) and has written over twenty books, including best-selling textbooks on criminal law, family law, and medical law and ethics.

&> How to Get What You Want...



Introduction     1

PART 1: Be the Kind of Person Who Gets What They Want     4

Know What You Want     6

Know Why You Want It     8

Know How Much You Want It     10

Want What You Get     12

Don’t Be a Fuzzy Thinker     14

Know What It Takes     16

Work Out Who You Need on Your Side     18

Break Big Ambitions into Chunks     20

Set Up Some Milestones     22

Celebrate Every Step     24

Write It All Down     26

Analyze Your Sticking Points     28

Set Your Deadlines     30

Check Out the Back Door     32

Don’t Make Excuses     34

Think Positive     36

Don’t Hang Out with Naysayers     38

Say It Out Loud     40

Believe in Yourself     42

Expect Ups and Downs     44

Enjoy It When You Get It     46

PART 2: Be the Kind of Person People Want to Say Yes To     48

Don’t Fake It—Have Real Confidence     50

Sound Confident     52

Look Confident     54

Learn to Say No     56

Give Them an Alternative     58

Be a Broken Record     60

Be Sure You’re Sorry     62

Say What You Mean     64

Think Before You Speak     66

Be Prepared to Disagree     68

Control Yourself     70

Express Yourself     72

Don’t Use Emotional Blackmail…     74

…and Don’t Give In to It     76

Treat People with Respect     78

Have Plenty of Time     80

Be Likeable     82

Have a Sense of Humor     84

Be Honest     86

Always Say Thank You     88

Don’t Do Too Much     90

Give a Bit Extra     92

Be Generous     94

Praise but Don’t Flatter     96

Be Loyal     98

Don’t Talk Behind People’s Backs     100

Learn to Take Criticism Well     102

Admit Your Mistakes     104

Get to Know People     106

Learn to Listen Properly     108

Know What You’ve Agreed To     110

Pick Up the Signals     112

Sympathize with Other People’s Anger     114

Don’t Respond to Tactical Anger     116

Give Other People Results     118

Be Part of Your Organization     120

Work Hard     122

Work Right     124

Be Worth It     126

PART 3: Help Them to Say Yes     128

Make Sure You’re Getting Through to Them     130

And Make Sure They’re Getting Through to You     132

Think About Why They’d Say No     134

Show You Understand     136

Be Objective     138

Give Them an Excuse to Make an Exception     140

Solve Their Problems     142

Read the Clues     144

Learn What Gets Them Going     146

Use the Right Words     148

Get the Timing Right     150

Tell Them What You Want Without Asking     152

Don’t Keep Dropping Hints     154

Make It Hypothetical     156

Ask Questions     158

Ask for Advice Instead of a Job     160

Get Someone to Do the Asking for You     162

Tell Them You Need Them     164

Don’t Rush Them     166

Give Them What They Want     168

Make Them Think It Was Their Idea     170

Discourage Their Bad Ideas     172

Find Out What It Will Take     174

Get a Team Behind You     176

PART 4: And If You Really Do Have to Ask…     178

Be Clear What You’re Asking     180

Pick Your Moment     182

Make a Date     184

Know When to Put It Off     186

Keep to the Script     188

Rehearse It     190

Rehearse Their Answer     192

Don’t Go On About It     194

Get the Essentials on Paper     196

Have a Bottom Line     198

Ask for More Than You Want     200

Don’t Make Empty Threats     202

Think About It     204

Put the Decision in Writing     206

Be Ready to Be Decisive     208

Don’t Give Up     210

 

How to Argue: Powerfully, Persuasively, Positively

 

Introduction     v
Part 1: The ten golden rules of argument
Chapter 1  Golden Rule 1: Be prepared     3
Chapter 2  Golden Rule 2: When to argue, when to walk away     15
Chapter 3  Golden Rule 3: What you say and how you say it     25
Chapter 4  Golden Rule 4: Listen and listen again     41
Chapter 5  Golden Rule 5: Excel at responding to arguments     53
Chapter 6  Golden Rule 6: Watch out for crafty tricks     65
Chapter 7  Golden Rule 7: Develop the skills for arguing in public     89
Chapter 8  Golden Rule 8: Be able to argue in writing     95
Chapter 9  Golden Rule 9: Be great at resolving deadlock     103
Chapter 10  Golden Rule 10: Maintain relationships     111
Part 2: Situations where arguments commonly arise
Chapter 11  How to argue with those you love     121
Chapter 12  How to argue with your children     131
Chapter 13  Arguments at work     145
Chapter 14  How to complain     153
Chapter 15  How to get what you want from an expert     165
Chapter 16  Arguing when you know you’re in the wrong     175
Chapter 17  Arguing again and again     183
Chapter 18  Doormats     195
Chapter 19  How to be a good winner     205
Chapter 20  To recap     211
Index     215