You Just Don't Understand

Suggesting that boys and girls grow up in essentially different cultures, the author explains how women use language to seek confirmation, make connections and reinforce intimacies, and men use it to protect their independence and negotiate status.

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Why is it that some women and men seem to talk at cross purposes? Some have claimed that conversations are the forum of male power games, but the author suggests that jockeying for attention is not the whole story and that even when domination is the result, it is not always the intention. She shows how many frictions may arise because girls and boys grow up in essentially different cultures. Where women use language to seek confirmation, make connections and reinforce intimacies, men use it to protect their independence and negotiate status. The result is that conversation becomes a cross-cultural communication, fraught with genuine confusion. Using examples and anecdotes, this book offers an approach to banishing the misunderstandings that confuse our relationships.