Parents Who Bully

Eric Maisel, Ph.D., is the author of more than 50 books in the areas of creativity, psychology, coaching, mental health, and cultural trends. He is a psychotherapist and the founder of the creativity coach profession, regularly working with lawyers, doctors, scientists, writers, painters, businesspeople, and folks from every walk of life. They include folks settled in a profession as well as people struggling to find an outlet for their intelligence and looking for work that will allow them to be as smart as they are. They include individuals who are successful in their careers and those who, because of the realities of the marketplace, struggle to achieve success. And through his books, they could include you. Sought after as an expert in his field, Dr. Maisel regularly contributes to Mad in America, writes a monthly print column for Professional Artist Magazine, and writes the "Rethinking Mental Health" blog for Psychology Today. He has been the keynote speaker at many conferences and leads Deep Writing workshops worldwide. Dr. Maisel currently resides in Walnut Creek, California. Visit him at www.ericmaisel.com. Dr. Duffy is a highly sought-after clinical psychologist, bestselling author, podcaster, certified life coach, and parenting and relationship expert. He has been working in his clinical practice with individuals, couples, teens, and families for nearly twenty-five years. Dr. Duffy’s refreshing and unique approach has provided the critical intervention and support needed to help thousands of individuals and families find their footing. Along with his clinical work, Dr. Duffy is the author of the number-one best-selling The Available Parent (Viva Editions, second edition released 2014). He is a frequent national media presence. He has been the regular parenting and relationship expert on Steve Harvey (with more than 75 appearances), and appears several times a month on WGN radio. He also appears frequently on other national and local television and radio outlets, and is cited regularly in national print and online publications. These include the Today show, Fox News, Chicago Tribune, Fox Good Day Chicago, The Jam, WGN-TV, the Morning Blend, NPR, the Huffington Post, the Wall Street Journal, Redbook, Time, Good Housekeeping, Men’s Health, Chicago Parent, Cosmopolitan, Teen Vogue, Wired, Parenting, Your Teen, Parents, Family Circle, Chicago Sun-Times, and Real Simple magazine, among many others. As noted, he is contributor to the Pear app and co-host of the podcast with Giuliana and Bill Rancic, consults on two films on teen anxiety, and co-host of a popular podcast, better, with his wife Julie. He is also a frequent guest on other parenting and self-help podcasts. Dr. Duffy lives outside Chicago with his wife Julie and son George.

Table of Contents
Author’s Preface

Part I. The Look of Mean




The World of Mean
Adverse Childhood Experiences
What Family Bullies Look Like
The Aggression Cluster
The Exploitation Cluster
The Narcissism Cluster
Born in Alabama
Daughter of a Beat
The Pleasure She Derived
Any Sadism Will Do
How Can I Survive?
Quixotic, Unclear Rules
My Accomplishments Will Not Bring Me Happiness
The Shaming Began
An Empty Shell
It Was a Pretty Typical Household
Theft by Amphetamines
They Dominate My Mind
When I Felt Strong Enough
So You Think That You’re Better Than Me?
Snapshots of Consequences
Eight Truths


Part II. Tools and Tactics


Create Physical Separation and Limit Contact
Create Psychological Separation
Practice Right Thinking
Redesign Your Mind
Grow Your Strength
Enlist Allies
Acknowledge Trauma
Listen to Your Body
Practice Calm Self-Awareness
Practice Self-Care
Stay Alert for Triggers
Create a Support System
Release Guilt and Shame
Speak Up
Honor Your Freedom
Identify Your Life Purposes
Live Your Life Purposes
Dismiss Apologists
Call Bullies on Their Behaviors
Practice Resilience
Think in Multiples
The Authoritarian Wound Questionnaire


Afterword

Acknowledgments

About the Author