INTRODUCTION

Growing up in our own house with other tenants was like being in the wild with all kinds of animals. Couples yelling and raining down insults on each other in front of their kids, became the new normal. Others would sneak in on their spouses and pounce on them like wild animals to tear them into pieces for suspicious activities with other men or women. Or sometimes, a husband would hit the wife so hard, Mother had to intervene to save lives.

This was the time, I asked myself, ‘Is that what marriage is all about? What did God intended marriage to be? Why all these problems?’ And where I also witnessed this typical scenario:

“Leave me alone. If you don’t, I will k… you,” I overheard *Captain James Jr., the naval officer, yell out to his wife, Auntie Ekua (as we normally called her).

“You can’t,” Auntie Ekua responded. “I will do you first before you get to me …” She was as strong and heady as her unbending husband.

“No one can stop me. You know that. Just wait and see what I will do to you. …”

Just another word from Auntie Ekua or whatever she might have uttered, triggered blows and slapping, and hard kicking flared up everywhere. Within a few moments, the wild combats going on inside Captain James Jr.’s living room, progressed to the kitchen, and then to the entire compound.

All the tenants came out to watch what was happening between the couple and to see what Mother, the landlord, would do. The children disappeared in tears. Auntie Ekua’s face was swollen, and blood gushing out of her mouth.

“James, you must stop right now.” Mother yelled out in tears. “You cannot do this in my house. You are setting bad examples for your kids. Stop, are you going to kill your wife?”

With that, some of the male tenants tried to separate the couple to no avail. As Mother tried her last attempt to talk to them to cease fire, Auntie Ekua fumed out to the husband, “You fool!”

Oh my! Captain James flared up again like a wild tornado on a mission. The speed with which Captain James flew toward his wife was incredible. In a second, his army-power-rage fist, missed the wife and went straight on to Mother’s chest.

Ohhh! Everyone yelled out! All eyes went directly on Mother who was moaning in shock and agony. Captain James stood still for a while and bowed his head in shame for hitting the generous and God-fearing landlady, who was trying to be the mediator.

My heart broke, but that wasn’t the end. Even children manipulating each other to get them punished to save their skins, having learned the same manipulative techniques from their own parents.

Not only that. I witnessed all kinds of ungodly practices perpetrated against the innocent among the families, which were uncalled for. I saw too much to even talk about them.

Although Dad died when I was seven years old, I never saw them exchanging words or saying unkind words to each other. And although my memory of my father’s relationship with my mother was different, I decided not to marry and fall prey to all the squabbling and inconsiderate behaviors adopted by most of the couples I watched closely, whether they confessed faith in Christ or were unbelievers.

But God, whose Sovereign plans are not ours to choose, and who knows what is best for me, gave me a godly man after His heart, who loved me beyond expression. Geoffrey’s love for me, and our relationship was exactly what the Father intended for all couples from the time He created Adam and Eve to the last generation that will witness the destruction of this sinful earth. But will it ever happen?

I hope so. I pray that it would before the Lord returns. That is why the mandate to spread the word across the globe must not stop at the confession of faith in Christ, but also to build the “whole person”, so that true transformation would occur which would appositively affect the entire family unit via Godly marriages.

As for Mother, she was never the same. She struggled with chest pains for years. Her suffering reminded me of the blows of sin Jesus Christ took so that we might be saved and enjoy the new life He gives to those who are willing to lay down their pride and listen. That is why I write when He tells me to. For I firmly believe that the Lord is counting on me and you, the readers, to get the out there and save lives!

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Thus said, the main reason I was prompted to write these books is to share what the Holy Spirit has deposited in me concerning this sacred union He instituted for humanity and what He purposed it to be. These insights He gave me are so powerful and life transforming to keep it to myself.  I must be a good steward of such grace and share them with others, because the truth will always set people free.  

The Three-Book Marriage Bible Studies Series are written with the health and longevity of all marriages in mind, and are aimed at:

• Informing and creating more awareness of the Origin of marriage and what is needed to fully enjoy God’s beautiful gift of marriage to mankind.
• Providing insightful Biblical truths that will stir up hearts that are willing to sit at the feet of Jesus to learn of Him and embrace Biblical truths that set captives free and restores marriages.  
• Empowering and motivating couples to interact with each other to tackle tough and important issues which are related to their own struggles, helping them build healthy relationships.

The Books and their inserted workbooks can be used as an alternative Bible Study to equip leaders, and to mentor married couples and prospective ones. Each insight is backed by contextual Scriptural passages.  The easy get-to assignments will also stir up discussions and interactions to engage married couples and even those who longing to get married. They will help create Godly standards for building a steady relationship that would last and incite couples to tackle issues together in the spirit of humility and Godly fear with the tools provided. 

I have not sought any inputs or scholarships from anywhere apart from what the Holy Spirit has downloaded into me over the years I’ve spent on my knees, crying for help as I ministered to lots of couples. Each time I went to the Lord with the problems the couples were bringing to my late husband and I, the Holy Spirit would share His heart with me and give me specific prescriptions to solve their problems. And anytime I implemented those prescribed solutions the Holy Spirit gave me, miracles began to happen, and the results were phenomenal. Marriages were restored and souls were saved. 

These materials are not intended to put anyone down, but to be a revelatory guide to draw couples and their families closer to the Lord. Therefore, if you have your own personal views or other ideas concerning what Godly marriages are supposed to be, kindly pray, and ask the Holy Spirit to open your spirit-mind and reveal the truth to you. He will open your ears and heart as we study along, so you can become one of His instruments who would help others build marriages that are designed by the Creator. And when all is said and done, only the Lord has all the rights to receive the glory!   

Now, since we all love to scroll through the internet to find recipes, I can say that these insights are part of the Holy Spirit’s special recipes for cooking healthy marriages where God Himself comes to sit at the table to share a meal with you because He is fully welcomed. Enjoy and Shalom! 

THE LEADER’S CORNER 

The Leader is provided with the outline of the Participant’s Workbook and the guidelines needed to initiate discussions and facilitate easy interactions. The sampled outline and instructions are attached for the leader’s convenience. Participant must be encouraged to engage and contribute to the group discussions, ask questions, and express themselves.

As we all know, personal involvement is very important. It enriches a person’s knowledge concerning whatever they are dealing with and stirs up positive actions so that healing and restoration can take place. The Participant’s Reflective Assignments, Group discussions, the final focus (about sharing what you learned or gleaned from the studies), and prayer time at the end of each chapter, are all geared at motivating everyone to engage.

Their willingness to respond to questions, will help them find solutions to problems and address all request to God as they join in with others to pray. You will also find most of the answers in the Book as you study along, backed by the Word of God.

1. Additional Scripture Reading: The Word of God is very rich and powerful. It convicts, instructs, inspires, and transforms the reader. So, kindly encourage participants to read the passages given to affirm their faith.  

1. Participants Reflections & Assignments: These are reflective moments that takes the participant inside themselves to dig into their own hearts and participate fully as they respond to the questions given.  

1. GROUP DISCUSSIONS: Motivation to contribute to the group discussions is the key.  Open the discussion and engage each participant to be part of the discussions. Then give them time to share their...