How to Be a Felon (eBook)

Chapter 1:
Mindset

“Always remember, your focus determines your reality.” – George Lucas

You must work, before anything else will. It is entirely up to you to put the first foot forward. You must prepare yourself mentally. Your approach and outlook on your situation will have the utmost effect on your ability to adapt and overcome.

Remember, I am not a psychologist or a decorated scholar that assumes they know what you’ve been through. I do not offer advice based upon assumptions, or trust in the flawed penal system. I am a fellow inmate that has completed the rigorous and mundane tasks set before all of us to free myself from the chains of the system. I am an ex-felon that has completed the expungement process after being denied repeatedly. I am a firearms aficionado that once thought I would never hold a gun again. I am a homeowner that once disbelieved in my ability to ever own a home. I have been homeless, dependent on drugs, incarcerated, depressed, and directionless. I overcame everything that ever stood in my way. My ability to conquer these challenges started internally, with my mindset and my unique approach to success.

The first decision you have to make is that you are a warrior. You must whole-heartedly believe nothing will defeat you. You must use whatever negative or positive spark your life’s journey has instilled into you to strengthen yourself mentally and spiritually. Some of us find power in our pain, and some of us find power in our triumphs. Some of us may find inspiration in the form of making our family or friends proud. Some of us may find inspiration in proving those that doubted us wrong. Wherever that passion is derived from, we must allow it to fuel us. You must commit yourself to becoming an anomaly. In most states the statistics are not in your favor. Somewhere between 85-95% of felons incarcerated will return to captivity within 1 year from the date of their release. These statistics differ slightly from area to area but typically remain within a similar range. You must decide that you are going to be part of the 5-15% that gets out and stays out.

Once you have made the decision that you are not going to allow yourself to fall into the same rut, then you must plan. You must create a framework that you will adhere to as you continue your journey. While I was incarcerated, I sat down and created a 5-year road map. On this road map I designed a goal-set to be completed within 3 months of release, 6 months from release, 1 year from release, 3 years from release, and 5 years from release. I included everything I could think of, I included what jobs I would look for and in what order I would look for them. I wrote down the salary levels, the cars I would aspire to get, the living situations I was determined to find myself in, etc.

As an example, I am going to provide you with an overview of my road map, and some data as to how accurate it was. Remember, this was my list of goals written while I was still incarcerated.

3 Months from release:

I was going to find any job I could on parole, I was going to complete parole, I was going to study for computer industry certifications, I was going to work with probation to get approved for interstate compact so that I could serve probation in California, I was going save enough money to buy a car upon my return to California.

6 Months from release:

I was going to find a job in the computer industry, the job was to pay $12 per hour or more, I was going to find a car in the $1,500 – $2,000 range (Honda, Nissan, Toyota was on my list), I was going to reside with family and save as much money as I could, I was going to finish some computer certifications to make myself more employable.

12 Months from release:

I was going to find a job in the computer industry, the job was to pay $15 per hour or more, I was going to own a car in the $2,500 – $5,000 range (Infiniti, Acura, Lexus, were on my list) I was going to get my own place to live, I was going to invest money into the stock market, I was going to start my expungement and get my rights back.

36 Months from release:

I was going to have a job in the computer industry, the job was to pay $22 per hour or more, I was going to own a car in the $8,000 – $12,000 range, I was going to reside in a house and not an apartment, I was going to be off of probation, I was going to leverage my stock market holdings (which did not exist) to start a restaurant/bar.

60 Months from release:

I was going to have a job in the computer industry, the job was to pay $30 per hour or more, I was going to own a car in the $15,000 – $25,000 range, I was going to purchase a home, I was going to finish computer certifications to make myself more employable, I was going to open 2 new locations for my restaurant/bar and move on to start several other businesses, My record was going to be expunged, and my rights reinstated.

Now let’s talk about reality. I didn’t accomplish half of the things I set out to do in my 5-year plan. What is important is that I did accomplish about 50%. Creating a guideline to follow is a crucial requirement for success. Trying to move forward when you have not crafted a pathway to follow, can leave you aimlessly moving in several directions and not heading toward any focused goal.

“If one does not know to which port one is sailing,
no wind is favorable.” –Seneca

In reality, 3 months from my release I had held a job and been approved for interstate compact, but I had not completed any computer certifications. Six months after release I had procured a $1,500 Nissan and I had secured a job in the computer industry that paid more than I was aiming for. One year after release I did not have my own place and I had not invested in the stock market or started my expungement. However, I did have a better car, and it was an Acura. 36 months from the date of my release I did have a job in the IT industry that paid more than $22/hr, and I had a car worth $8,000-$12,000. I did not own stocks, or a restaurant, and I lived in an apartment, not a house.

As you can see, you will rarely complete 100% of your goals. Life happens, and factors change. Limitations present themselves and you must adapt to what life throws at you. What is important is having an idea of where you want to go and doing everything within your power to get there.

Part of navigating life as a felon is realizing that the cards will often be stacked against you. This fact is not cause for alarm, it’s simply what you must expect. It will be 3 times harder for you, and you will be required to solve 3 times as many problems as compared to everyone else. What this does for you is sharpen your ability to solve problems and think critically. It also teaches you to be prepared and always have several contingency plans. These trials and tribulations will better prepare you for life and increase your value. The more puzzles you solve the better you will be at solving puzzles. You must alter your approach to view troubling situations in this light. You will be tested, you will be frustrated, and you will be given false hope, this is a vicious cycle, and it will happen repeatedly.

Do not give up. A mistake is only a mistake the second time it is made, the first time it is a lesson. Education is always expensive, and you will cost yourself a lot of time, money, and patience learning the lessons this journey has to offer. The trick is to be sure you learn from your experiences. After you’ve been through enough challenges you will begin to predict situational outcomes and requirements. You will naturally prepare yourself based upon your established knowledge; this is wisdom.

“All animals, including humans, need to see the connection between action and consequence in order to learn or react appropriately.”
– Jocko Willink

One thing that navigating the playing field as a felon will provide is wisdom and understanding. You will begin to see the red tape before it appears, you will make multiple copies of documents, you will notarize things before submitting them, etc. When you get rejected, you need to add the reasons to your mental archive. Before you know it, you’ll have the answer to things before they are asked, you will have justifications and rebuttals to employers and property managers that work. You will recall laws and policies from experience, and you’ll begin getting things right the first time. In some cases, you’ll impress and shock those around you with your intelligence and expertise.

Don’t get down on yourself for hitting bumps in the road. Realize that every bump in the road is a lesson on how to navigate the next path. Every situation presents a unique set of challenges and lessons that you benefit from whether you are successful in overcoming them or not. In many cases, failure is the best teacher.

Your mindset and your response to a situation will often dictate how it plays out for you. Another extremely underrated factor is the impression you make upon those around you. Other people’s perception of you has everything to do with the way you handle yourself especially under pressure or in stressful situations.

I can’t teach you how to be a man, that would be a book all of it’s own. What I can...