8 (eBook)

Introduction

“When we meet real tragedy in life, we can react in two ways—either by losing hope and falling into self-destructive habits, or by using the challenge to find our inner strength. We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.”

—Dalai Lama XIV

Your twenties bring change, confrontation, and transformation. Mine did in spades. Whether you follow a traditional path and go to university, then enter the workforce, or choose to strike out on your own as I did, the first decade of making your way in the world as an adult is often filled with confusion, anxiety, and fear. And just when it seems like you’ve figured it out, the quarter-life crisis hits—and it hits hard.

Maybe you were driven to this book by your curiosity around how wealth is forged and fostered. You might be motivated by a profound ambition to compete at the highest level in your industry and dominate your profession, a fire that we share. Or maybe you’ve already created your legacy of success and wealth and are now seeking something different, something deeper. Since I was a little kid, I’ve been interested in building business, but if you’ve read my blog, listened to my podcast, or stumbled across me on the internet, you might know that as I’ve grown as a man, I’ve become most curious about the concept of building balance. “Balance” is the foundation on which our professional and personal aspirations meet. It’s the magic equation that we are continually challenged to re-evaluate and rework throughout our lives. At least, that’s been the case for me.

I believe all of the world’s most impactful leaders and innovators share a few core qualities which I would like you to keep in mind as you navigate the arc of this book. These qualities are not a secret, nor are they impossible to attain. In fact, quite the opposite. They’re simple and achievable: an insatiable curiosity, an undying passion for what they do, a deeply embedded work ethic, and, in the case of the best ones, an unwavering moral compass. So, as you self-reflect with me, have the courage to question assumptions you hold about yourself and the world, and with the answers you find, build your best life. It’s not an easy process, but I can tell you from experience, it’s worth the work.

The future of the world as we know it is more uncertain than ever and grows increasingly so for the generations that follow. A rapid pace of change for the millennial generation has become the new normal. Technological breakthroughs and revolutions only act as a catalyst to these massive changes. On top of this, we’re now feeling the devastating effects of world tensions reaching their breaking point. The global rise of populism over the past decade, disintegrating trust in western world leadership, and the dismantling of globalization have resulted in unprecedented cries for a solution to the great inequality that is rampant in the world.

I am acutely aware that I’m one of the lucky ones. I was born in the safe, democratic country that is Canada. I was blessed with all of the basics of a good life: food on the table, shelter, and clean running water. But there are large groups of youth all around the world who no longer have the luxury of the notion that they’ll glide through high school and college on “cruise control” and their basic human needs will be met on the other side. Yet, despite the challenges, there are still opportunities to build a better future and rise above.

How do we approach these escalating global problems and work together to seek solutions? It starts by not ignoring that there is a problem in the first place. We have to look this pain squarely in the face and hold empathy for the challenges each one of us is experiencing, some on a much larger scale than others. We can find ways to activate and engage innovative technology for the better with the hopes of creating a better quality of life for all and more equal opportunity for so much of the world population that has gone without in the past. Part of “finding the balance” is re-framing our perspective. Instead of viewing these current conditions as challenges, we can look at them as our invitation to grow.

The Quarter-Life Crisis is Real

This book is about navigating an intense period of life, a period that is filled with rapid growth, and the harsh realization that all the things, norms, and ways of living that we have been taught to be the absolute truth by our teachers, parents, and even grandparents may not actually be true or serve our society as they once did. Not because they hatched a scheme to lie to us, quite the contrary; I believe earnestly that most of what we are taught by our community is taught to us in an effort to protect and guide us, like bumpers on a bowling lane to the next generation. But the world has changed, and every generation is invited to rise and meet this change with ingenuity, empathy, and bravery. It’s becoming clear now that the leaders of several aspects of our society do not always do the best job navigating our world’s biggest, newest challenges.

You might find yourself, as I did, asking the hard questions. Did we get ripped off? How are we going to achieve the same quality of life our parents did? Who do we turn to when leadership fails us? And maybe the scariest and most universal question of all, “Are we going to be okay?”

We hear a lot of buzz words tossed into answering these questions like “authentic,” “vulnerable,” “conscious.” But we don’t truly know what they mean or how to harness their power in large-scale leadership, or even on a micro level as the leaders of our own lives. If you’re like me, you’re trying to understand the changing tides of the world while also trying to find your place in it and make a good—maybe even world-class—living. How do you balance your ambition for success and wealth with your desire to be of service to the world? How do you even reach that success and wealth in the first place, so you can enjoy the ultimate and most fulfilling act of all—the privilege and impact of giving back?

These are big questions that I’ll be humbly exploring with you as I share my story: the good, the bad, and the ugly. Not everything will be solved in one day, or even one decade, but it’s not the destination that matters. It’s always the road. It’s the relationships you honor. It’s the moments, the most epic highs and the deepest lows. It’s trying to be more conscious. It’s becoming resilient in the face of daunting obstacles and uncertainty. It’s learning to rise back up with a smile on your face and try again even when it feels like the weight of the world is pinning you down. It’s celebrating all kinds of feelings. It’s being gracious and grateful. It’s being kind. It’s allowing yourself a laugh when your life starts to feel like a sitcom. It’s being brave enough to be your imperfect, ambitious, ever-expanding, true self. It’s celebrating being and feeling human.

Sharing My Story

Documenting and sharing your life story is a way to connect with something bigger than yourself and say, “I’m here. I’m alive. I understand.” It’s also incredibly therapeutic. Embarking on the process of writing and exploring my own memories has been a journey in itself, and I hope my resulting vulnerability allows you to feel less alone and more heard. I’ve discovered humans have the ability to free themselves from their most painful narratives simply by being honest about them, giving them air, and letting them go.

Like everyone else, I spent a good part of my twenties not even being aware of the old childhood wounds that I carried heavily with me on my chest into adulthood. During my teenage years, I unfortunately didn’t have my father in my life to lean on, but in the void that ensued, I found an opportunity to create and lean on a new set of mentors who became father-like figures to me along the way. While I was fortunate to learn a few valuable lessons in my twenties, I admittedly picked up a few traits I decided to leave behind as I further defined the kind of man I truly wanted to become.

From age fourteen to twenty-nine, I focused solely on building capital, and I did it well. I’d invested in real estate. I’d been an early investor in over one hundred venture startups, co-founded or been the major seed investor in more than twenty companies, a few of which are valued at over $500 million, a few that have surpassed $1 billion, reaching “unicorn” status. Money meant control for me, a way I could create a moat around my emotions, which had been fractured as I grew up. Money also meant responsibility and choice, but it was the freedom and recognition money brought me that motivated me more than anything else. There was also a hidden bonus that became more and more valuable; the more financial success I gained, the more access I had to some of the most interesting and successful business icons in the world. I’m now lucky to count many of these men and women as both my mentors and friends.

While I believed and still believe that financial strength is definitely part of living a healthy and balanced life, my mistake was that I thought life was only about financial strength. When I was young, I wasn’t mature enough to see past the shallowness of this thought. Not the first nor last mistake I will make! Social media isn’t helping this perception. If you take a quick scroll through your feeds, you’ll find many of the world’s biggest “influencers” sharing countless photos and videos of luxury items, fast cars, and private jets. I think this only adds to the confusion. Is this success? I’ve come to learn...