Coordinating Chaos (eBook)

Tips on Surviving the Wackiness of Mom-life

Alicia Gibson (Autor)

eBook Download: EPUB

2020 | 1. Auflage
159 Seiten
10-10-10 Publishing (Verlag)
978-1-77277-361-3 (ISBN)

Momlife is wacky. Between the kids, work, house work, school work, sports, activities.... having a feeling of overwhelm is inevitable. We look at the moms around us and feel inadequate. We see the pictures on social media and feel like everyone else 'gets it'. So what is wrong with us? The answer is - nothing!! Everything that you need to rock the mom life is in you right now - and with a little perspective and some strategies in your big mom purse, you can knock that overwhelm right out. This book is first, going to help you feel normal and know that you are not in this alone. We are all doing this mom-thing together. It is also going to provide you with a few ideas to consider as we dig into common mom 'hot buttons' like: Organizing your time, Managing your schedule Addressing unrealistic expectations Setting Boundaries Dealing with Mindset and Fears of Inadequacy With real life examples of just how hilariously ridiculous the juggling act can be, this book breaks down the things that hold us back as moms and provides some practical tips that can help us survive (and enjoy!) coordinating the chaos of mom-hood.

Momlife is wacky. Between the kids, work, house work, school work, sports, activities.... having a feeling of overwhelm is inevitable. We look at the moms around us and feel inadequate. We see the pictures on social media and feel like everyone else 'gets it'. So what is wrong with us? The answer is - nothing!! Everything that you need to rock the mom life is in you right now - and with a little perspective and some strategies in your big mom purse, you can knock that overwhelm right out. This book is first, going to help you feel normal and know that you are not in this alone. We are all doing this mom-thing together. It is also going to provide you with a few ideas to consider as we dig into common mom 'hot buttons' like:Organizing your time, Managing your scheduleAddressing unrealistic expectationsSetting BoundariesDealing with Mindset and Fears of Inadequacy With real life examples of just how hilariously ridiculous the juggling act can be, this book breaks down the things that hold us back as moms and provides some practical tips that can help us survive (and enjoy!) coordinating the chaos of mom-hood.

#itsfine

What is your hashtag for life? I mean, if you had to assign a hashtag that summed up your life in one short, run together phrase, what would it be? There are tons to choose from. We see them all the time attached to fun pics of moms in cute exercise outfit, laughing with their kids in their gorgeous kitchen - #tooblessedtostress #messyhairdontcare #nohoodlikemotherhood. Mine is #itsfine.

I really truly say that at least 20 times a day. My two middle boys get in a fight over who gets to play with a very specific Fortnite toy, even though we have like 9,000 other toys - #itsfine. My daughter decides that right when we are all getting in the car for dinner is the perfect time to make an outfit AND hairstyle change - #itsfine. My teenage son takes 40 minutes to wake up for school, then spends 15 minutes making a sandwich, which puts us 10 minutes late out the door - #itsfine.

You get it. Really what "it's fine" translates into is - this situation is kinda nuts, and kids do wacky things, but I'm gonna keep on truckin' and not let this add stress to my life.

This definitely wasn’t always my motto, though. When my teenager, my oldest, the sweet apple of my eye (yah, there’s a little sarcasm in there) was little, we had 'ideas' about what was best. Of course, we did! Don't we all have these grandiose ideas of what motherhood will be like and how we will parent when we have our first kid? At this time, also, my husband was very... well, let's say, particular to put a nice spin on it...about food.

Twelve years ago, "organic" was not as readily available, or talked about, or accepted, like it is now. We sent our firstborn at this time to a preschool that served a hot breakfast and lunch - it was part of the cost, and which was also great because it’s one less thing to have to organize or worry about each day. But, then, what kind of food were they serving? Was it organic? How was it cooked? How could I call myself a good mom if I let him eat anything less than the best?

And in all our first-child snobbery, we decided it wasn't "good enough" for our sweet dear. So, every morning my husband would make Drew a lunch to take to his preschool. An added stress to each morning - and we all know that mornings with kids are already stressful- but regardless, he would leave for school, the only kid walking up with a lunchbox in hand.

One day, after school, I hear my husband, Brandon, in the kitchen asking Drew why he hadn't eaten his lunch. I walked in to observe the conversation or eavesdrop, same same. As Brandon opened up the Tupperware (yes, that is correct, Tupperware, for a toddler) I asked him what he had packed. He replied in a perfectly matter-of-fact tone "Salmon on a bed of lettuce." Huh? I’m sorry, did you say salmon? Yah, he had packed a 3-year-old salmon on a bed of lettuce. And sent him to preschool with it. To eat next to a kid eating bagel bites and grapes. No wonder he didn't eat it!! This is when I think I subconsciously adopted the "it's fine" motto. My perspective changed. I realized he would be fine - bagel bites and all. And he is.

The thing is, we all have stories like this. Well, maybe not exactly like this - but we have dealt with things in our mom lives that have changed our perspectives, challenged our beliefs, and made us look around to see if someone is secretly videotaping us for an episode of Practical Jokers. And that is a big theme of this book - we ALL deal with things that make us say #itsfine. We all are Chaos Coordinators. It’s easy to feel like we are solo flyers, that no one understands, that if we told people how ridiculous our day, schedule, kids are, they would look at us like we were growing a third boob. But that is not the truth. As we work through some of the big ol’ hot buttons we mamas face on the daily, I hope you will see how ‘normal’ you are and that with just a little bit of mom ammunition under our belt as we tackle the wacky, we all really can say #itsfine.

No one has it Together

"I don't know how you do it all. You have it all under control.” There isn't a day that goes by that another mom doesn't say these words to me. They see me with my five kids, my full-time teaching job, my health business - and then see me doing the "mom" stuff of running people around to sports and activities, and think that maybe I have it all together because I haven't pulled all my hair out yet. When they say this - I want to give them a hug and help them see the truth - I have zero things together. Really.

Let me give you a small glimpse into my every day. Fisher, my 6-year-old, was given a Gatorade after his football game for his snack. He left it in the car so that when we got back in the car after dinner, at around 8 pm, he decided it was time to drink the whole thing. Of course I told him no, that he didn't need a giant Gatorade right before bed, which was the trigger for him to literally FLIP OUT. He screamed - over and over and over - "Give me MY Gatorade!" for the entire car ride home. And when I say screamed - please picture a pterodactyl screech mixed with inconsolable crying. It was actually insane.

I tried reassuring him and telling him that I understood his disappointment, but the screeching didn't stop. So, what do I do as a good mom??? Turn up my radio to drown it out and try to get all the other kids to sing along to the song. About halfway home, my husband, Brandon, turned to me and said, "I'm going to lose my mind." It was true, me too. That 15 minute car ride home felt like 4 1/2 hours. It took everything in me to not freak out. When we got home, I pried the Gatorade from his hand and walked him (while he screamed) all the way to his room and got him into his bed, where he finally screamed himself to sleep. The next morning, he came into my room, all sunshine and smiles, and didn't even remember the events of the night before.

Things like this are honestly a daily occurrence. I always say that my life should be a reality show. I mean - it's crazy, full of interesting characters, and insane plot lines. I definitely don't have anything figured out or 'all together' - let's be real, at any given moment, I'm one kid tantrum away from jumping in my car and driving to Mexico.

So what's the deal? There isn't any hope for us mamas? Everything is always going to be crazy? YEP! None of us have it together. And that is great news!

I told the Gatorade-tantrum story to a friend the other day and she thanked me for sharing it. She said that she feels like she is going to lose her mind with her kids too - and it's nice to know that it's not just her. Hearing this story helped her, as she said, feel normal.

Here's the truth: We moms are ALL doing our best to take care of our people, give them good experiences, teach them to become productive, contributing members of society- all while trying not to have a breakdown.

And, since we are all just coordinating the crazy on a day-today basis, another truth we can hold on to is that we are all in this together! Us moms get it! We know all that our mom lives entail and because each of us can relate - we can lean on each other in the crazy. To feel normal. To share stories. To sometimes commiserate. And most importantly, to encourage each other to keep on truckin'.

So what is the big ol' lesson that we can take from this...It isn't just you! It's all of us. No matter the circumstances we are in - stay at home mom, working mom, one kid, five kids - we can all share our stories and help each other feel normal. And that, my sweet friend, is what we are gonna focus on throughout this book, so that at the end you know that you got all the skills you need to rock this mom-thing and you are not in it alone.

The Easy Way and the Quick Fix

I was asked to speak to the Moms’ group at my church. Our theme for that night was Organization, which if you know me, you know that I love. I thought about what to talk about for a few weeks and could think of NOTHING. Well, that’s not true, I had lots of thoughts but none of them seemed “right.” In considering the theme, and looking for some inspiration, I started glancing at the different magazines I subscribe to – Better Homes and Gardens, Cooking Light, Real Simple, Shape.

I started out looking for ideas about Organization, but as I was glancing over the covers, one word started to stand out “Easy”. There were titles like “Your Easy Organizing Makeover” “Easy Weeknight Eating” “Easy Garden-inspired Touches for Every Room” “The Easy Way to Eat Less” (which I don’t even know what that means!) Then the tagline for Real Simple magazine caught my eye, “Life made easier.” “Life made easier” ...wow, isn’t that what we are all looking for? The easy way to “do” life?

We don’t have to stretch our imagination too far or think too hard about why this is such an appeal… Life is frickin’ hard! Being a mom is hard! And the promise or the suggestion of ways to make it simpler is something we all really want- and could use. Who wouldn’t want a life that was more simple and easier to manage? The truth is, though, life is just gonna be hard. Raising people is just going to be hard. Heck, Jesus, himself, said in John 16:33 “In this world you will have trouble” – in other words, it’s not going to be easy, and expect it not to be. There is no ‘easy’ way to do things. There is not an ‘easy’ way to have it all together. Really… there is NO way to have it ALL together, and that...

Erscheint lt. Verlag	2.6.2020
Vorwort	Raymond Aaron
Sprache	englisch
Themenwelt	Sachbuch/Ratgeber ► Gesundheit / Leben / Psychologie ► Familie / Erziehung
ISBN-10	1-77277-361-1 / 1772773611
ISBN-13	978-1-77277-361-3 / 9781772773613

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