The Rules of Love

Richard Templar (Devon, UK) is an astute observer of human behavior who understands what makes the difference between those who effortlessly glide towards success and those who struggle against the tide. He has distilled these observations into his Rules titles, read by more than one million people around the world. His global best-sellers include "The Rules of Life," "The Rules of Money," and "The Rules of Work." His books also include "I Don't Want Any More Cheese: I Just Want Out of the Trap."

Introduction



Rules for Finding Love



1 Be yourself

2 Get over it before you get on with it

3 You won't be happy with a partner until you can be happy on your own

4 You'll know them when you meet them

5 Choose someone who makes you laugh

6 Being less than a hundred percent attractive is a great filter

7 Don't keep making the same mistakes

8 Certain people are off limits (you know who they are)

9 You can't change people

10 Relationships aren't about sex

11 Get to know someone through all the seasons before making any major decisions

12 Don't stay with someone who doesn't care

13 If you can't trust them, you haven't got a relationship

14 Be honest (while you still have the chance)

15 Don't play games

16 Don't tar new partners with old brushes

17 Check you both have the same shared goals

18 You can't make someone love you

19 Be cruel to be kind



Relationship Rules



20 Be nice

21 Be together because you want to, not because you need to

22 Allow your partner the space to be themselves

23 Look to your own faults

24 Be honourable

25 Put each other first

26 Recognize the signs

27 Be a hero - or a heroine

28 Accept the differences, embrace what you have in common

29 Don't belittle your partner

30 You want to do what?

31 Let not the sun go down upon your wrath

32 Be the first to say sorry

33 Let them have the last word

34 Houston, we have a problem

35 Don't put them on a pedestal and expect them to stay there

36 Know when to listen and when to act

37 Never stop trying to be attractive

38 If you can say something nice, do

39 Don't try to be their parent

40 Be part of their life

41 If little things annoy you, say so - with humour

42 Go that extra step in trying to please them

43 Make sure your partner is always pleased to see you

44 Don't dump responsibility on your partner

45 Let them know if you don't like their friends

46 Jealousy is your stuff, not theirs

47 Your partner is more important than your kids

48 Make time for romance

49 Have a passion for your life together

50 Share the workload

51 Trust the other one to do the job

52 Don't be a nag

53 Make sure your love making is making love

54 Don't control them

55 Listen to what they're not saying

56 Most everyday arguments are about something else

57 Respect privacy

58 Treat your partner better than your best friend

59 Don't be offended if they want some space

60 Men like flowers too

61 Keep your finances separate

62 Contentment is a high aim

63 Be generous to each other financially

64 You make a choice every day

65 Don't be a martyr

66 Stop sniping - someone has to

67 You don't both have to have the same rules

68 Do it their way if it matters to them

69 Put yourself in their shoes

70 In-laws are part of the package

71 Keep talking



Rules for Parting



72 Listen to your own internal voice

73 Recognize that it takes two

74 Keep the moral high ground

75 Don't keep raking it over

76 Leave the kids out of it



Family Rules



77 Don't blame your parents

78 Don't let your parents control your feelings

79 Your children come before you

80 Nothing is worth falling out over

81 Treat them right, no matter how they treat you

82 There are no circumstances in which it is ever acceptable to say 'I told you so'

83 Don't pressurize your family just because you can

84 Never be too busy for loved ones

85 Your children need to fall out with you to leave home

86 They don't have to be the same as you

87 There's always stuff with siblings

88 Let go of your role





Friendship Rules



89 There are no rules

90 Your best friend was once a stranger

91 Only have people in your life who, on balance, make it better not worse

92 If you're going to be a friend, be a good friend

93 Forgive

94 Never give advice

95 Don't make other people uncomfortable

96 Find friends who love the truth

97 Never lend money unless you're prepared to write it off

98 If you don't like their partner, tough

99 When one finger points forwards, three point back

100 Friendships change

101 Know when to let go

102 Bitterness helps no one





Rules for Everyone



103 People are more important than things

104 Guilt is a selfish emotion

105 Love equals time

106 The more you put out, the more you get back

107 Other people are where it's at