52 Life-Changing Lessons I Learned in Recovery

Dr. Lisa A. Stanton, PhD is a social psychologist, writer, and presenter with a specialization in behavior change theory and applications. During her time as a graduate student at the University of Minnesota one of Lisa’s many accomplishments was being named the student advisory council chair for division 38 of the American Psychological Association. She then spent two years as a fellow of the National Cancer Institute, which she spent researching behavioral cancer prevention at Northwestern School of Medicine in Chicago. Over the past several years Lisa also taught numerous college courses, co-authored over thirty academic publications, and presented at conferences in four countries. Currently, she helps her thousands of followers through her media and workshops about recovering from addiction. 52 Life-Changing Lessons I Learned in Recovery is her debut book, detailing her spiritual journey to recovery from addiction. Lisa currently lives with her husband in Minnesota. Karen Casey, Ph.D. is a bestselling author specializing in self-recovery titles that focus on mindfulness and meditation for healing purposes. Having graduated from the University of Minnesota and becoming director of a publishing house, Casey rediscovered her love for connecting with readers through her work and became a full-time author. She is most known for her 1982 debut book, Each Day a New Beginning, which sold over 3.5 million copies. Since then, Casey has published 28 more books about her healing process through powerful affirmations so that other men and women can find their own serenity in quitting addiction. She has published other recognizable titles such as Change Your Mind and Your Life Will Follow, Getting Unstuck, and 52 Ways to Live the Course of Miracles. Casey currently resides in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

Contents
Introduction: My Story



Part I: Spiritual Diagnostics




Self-Control Won’t Keep You Sober
The Opposite of Addiction Is Not Connection
The Truth about Admitting You Are Powerless over Alcohol (Or Anything Else…)
What Is an Eating Disorder?
What a Craving Is Really Like and What I Do About It
Why Another Day of Sobriety Is Not My Goal
The Difference between a Spiritual Mentor and a Therapist


Part II: Stepping Away from Secular Spirituality




Trusting God Isn’t Trendy, but the New Age Left Me Empty
Artificial Versus Organic Gratitude
Self-Love Is Not My Goal
How I Stopped My Negative Thoughts Once and for All
What if Your Triggers Are Just Sins You Haven’t Confessed?
The Real Secret to Happiness (and the Delusion of Unhappiness)
So, You Think You Want to Be Confident
Is Expressing Emotions to Other People Actually Healing?
The Truth about Low Self-Esteem


Part III: Coming to Believe




Don’t Believe in God? Try Prayer
Do you Live in Faith or Just Believe in God? (The Grocery Store Metaphor)
How Deep Do You Need to Go?
How Do You Know That God is Real?
Why I Stopped Trying to Change My Behavior
The Outcomes Are Up to God, Not Me (No More “Magic Pillow Cure”)


Part IV: Denial and Guilt




Guilt Is Not a Feeling
Are You in Denial?
Your Pain Is Not Their Fault
You Aren’t Actually Angry at Yourself
Are You Guilty of Splitting Your Guilt?
Connect with the Whispers of Your Conscience and You Won’t Have to Hear the Screams
If No One Else Will Get Hurt, Is It Still Wrong?
The Importance of Pulling the Root


Part IV: Forgiveness




A Story of Radical Forgiveness
I Let Go of the Past and Stopped Saying — “They Did the Best They Could”
You Might Have Forgiveness All Wrong
The Resentment Paradox
How to Get Rid of Resentment
I Stopped Trying to Rationalize and Justify Other’s Behavior and This Happened…


Part V: Prayer and Everyday Miracles




A Way to Pray
The Story of the Blue Truck
Learning to Differentiate God’s Plan from My Plan
If Life Feels Hard, Lack of Humility Might Be the Cause
The Incredible Results of Turning Off My Internal Calculator
If You Give, You Will Receive
Two-Way Prayer: A Lesson, Sharing My Own, and an Exercise to Do Right Now
Why I Don’t Pray that the World Changes
Don’t Get Lost in the Big Picture
How a Totaled Motorcycle Reminded Me to Trust God’s Plan


Part VI: Relationships




Why I Don’t Ask People for Forgiveness
The Way Out of the Cycle of Shame
How I Let Go of My Addiction to Approval from Others
I Don’t Trust My Friends
Discovering the Reality of Friendship
It’s Okay to Not Have the Last Word
How to Stop Caring What They Think
On Feeling Forced to Take a Side: The Relational Pep Rally
A Deep Dive into Dishonesty
The Dark Side of Boundaries
The One Relationship I Need
I Thought I Was a People-Pleaser


Part VII: Life Events




A New Year’s Resolution You Can Start Today and Why I Gave Away Brand-new Diamond Earrings
Four Hours after I Lost My Job, I Wrote This
Grief, Selfishness, and Faith: How I Understand and Experience Grief after the Recent
Deaths of Five Loved Ones
What Will Your Gravestone Say? “I Wish It Would Have Been Different” or “That Sure Was Fun!”
The Wedding Day Essay
A Reflection on My Grandparents Passing
Sadness, Grief, and God
If the Holidays Are Hard on You, I Have Been There, Too, and This Could Be Why



Acknowledgments

About the Author