Emotional Intelligence for Students, Parents, Teachers and School Leaders (eBook)

Preface 6
Acknowledgements 8
Contents 9
List of Tables 17
1 Understanding Emotional Intelligence 18
1.1 Introduction 18
1.2 What Is EI? 18
1.2.1 Self-Awareness 19
1.2.2 Managing Emotions 19
1.2.3 Empathy and Social Awareness 20
1.2.4 Relationships Skills 21
1.3 IQ, EQ and EI 21
1.3.1 What Is IQ? 21
1.3.2 What Is EQ? 22
1.3.3 What Is EI? 23
1.4 Theories and Models of EI 23
1.4.1 Bar-On’s EI Competencies Model 24
1.4.2 Mayer, Salovey and Caruso’s EI Ability Models 25
1.4.3 Goleman’s EI Performance Model 26
1.4.4 The Trait EI Model 27
1.5 Why Is EI so Important? 28
1.5.1 EI Enhances Our Personal Growth and Self-Improvement 29
1.5.2 EI Helps Us to Understand How Emotions Impact Our Health 30
1.5.3 EI Supports Us in Coping with Strong Emotions 30
1.5.4 EI Helps Us to Build Healthy Family Relationships 31
1.5.5 EI Enhances Positive Social and Work Relationships 31
1.5.6 Make Friends and Build Support with Increased EI 32
Resources 33
References 33
2 Understanding Emotions 36
2.1 Introduction 36
2.2 Emotions and Our Mind, Body, and Spirit 36
2.2.1 How Traditional Chinese Medicine Explains Emotions and Our Body 37
2.3 Primary and Secondary Emotions 40
2.4 Emotions and Our Cognitive Processes 42
2.4.1 How Our Moods Affect Learning and Memory 43
2.4.2 Connections Between Emotions, Thoughts, and Beliefs 44
2.5 The Social Aspects of Emotions 44
2.5.1 Viewing Emotions with a Social Lens 45
2.5.2 Cultural Influence on Our Emotions 46
2.5.3 The Benefits of Developing Social-Emotional Intelligence 48
References 49
3 Functions of Emotions 53
3.1 Introduction 53
3.2 An Evolutional Interpretation of the Functions of Emotions 53
3.3 Alternative Views on the Functions of Emotions 55
3.4 Say Hello to Some of Your Core Emotions 56
3.4.1 Happiness and Joy 56
3.4.2 Sadness and Depression 58
3.4.3 Pride and Embarrassment 60
3.4.4 Guilt and Shame 62
3.4.5 Anger and Frustration 64
3.4.6 Fear and Calmness 66
3.4.7 Love and Empathy 68
3.4.8 Jealousy and Hatred 71
3.5 The Functions of Emotions 74
3.5.1 Emotions Help Us to Learn About Our Basic Human Needs 74
3.5.2 Emotions Motivate Action 75
3.5.3 Emotions Help Us to Connect and Relate to Others 75
3.5.4 Emotions Help Us to Verify How We Think About Ourselves 76
3.5.5 Emotions Help Us to Gain Autonomy and Personal Competence 77
3.6 Emotion, Thought and Behaviour 77
3.6.1 Defence Mechanisms 79
3.7 Conclusion 81
References 81
4 How to Boost Your Emotional Intelligence 89
4.1 Introduction 89
4.2 Self-Awareness 89
4.2.1 The Internal Self 91
4.2.2 The External Self 94
4.3 Other-Awareness 96
4.4 How to Increase Our Self-Awareness and Other-Awareness 100
4.5 Self-Management and Relationship Management 101
References 105
5 Family Relationships and EI 107
5.1 Introduction 107
5.2 Family Structures and Combinations 107
5.2.1 Types of Family Structure and Combinations 108
5.2.2 Changes to Family Structure and Transition Adjustments 109
5.3 Family Dynamics 111
5.4 Factors Shaping Family Satisfaction 112
5.4.1 Unconditional Love and Strong Family Bonds 112
5.4.2 Personality and Personal Characteristics 113
5.4.3 Interpersonal Relationships Within the Family 114
5.4.4 Financial Stability 114
5.4.5 Quality Family Time 115
5.4.6 Support in Stressful Situations 115
5.4.7 Life Ideals and Values 115
5.4.8 Realistic Expectations 116
5.4.9 Compatibility 116
5.4.10 Power Sharing 116
5.5 Marriage and Family 117
5.5.1 Why Do People Get Married? 118
5.5.2 Factors in a Healthy Marriage 118
5.5.3 Marital Conflict 119
5.6 Emotional Intelligence in Family Relationships 121
Resources 123
References 125
6 Parent–Child Relationships and EI 128
6.1 Introduction 128
6.2 Parent–Child Relationships 128
6.2.1 Understanding Attachment 129
6.2.2 Adult Attachment Styles 132
6.2.3 Attachment, Emotion Regulation, and Interpersonal Relationships 133
6.3 Theories that Guide Parenting 134
6.3.1 Behavioural Theories 134
6.3.2 Cognitive Developmental Theory 136
6.3.3 Psychosocial Development Theory 137
6.3.4 Social Learning Theory 139
6.4 Parenting Styles and Positive Parenting 141
6.5 Childhood Trauma and Parenting 143
6.6 Getting in Touch with Our Inner Child 146
6.7 Parenting and EI 148
References 149
7 Sibling Relationships and EI 153
7.1 Introduction 153
7.2 Sibling Relationships and Our Psychosocial Development 153
7.2.1 Sibling Relationships in Childhood and Adolescence 155
7.3 Family Dynamics and Sibling Relationships 156
7.3.1 Family Context 156
7.3.2 Birth Order and Sibling Relationships 157
7.3.3 Parental Emotional Maturity and Its Impact on Sibling Relationships 158
7.3.4 Sibling Conflict and Rivalry 160
7.3.5 Parenting and Managing Sibling Relationships 161
7.4 Sibling Relationships in Unusual Circumstances 164
7.5 Sibling Relationships in Adulthood 166
7.6 Sibling Relationships and EI 169
References 170
8 Friendships and Romantic Relationships 176
8.1 Introduction 176
8.2 Friendships at Different Stages of Our Lives 176
8.2.1 Childhood Friendship 177
8.2.2 Teen Friendship 178
8.2.3 Adult Friendship 181
8.2.4 Friendships in Older Adulthood 183
8.3 Friendships in the Digital World 184
8.4 Friendship and Relationship Conflicts 187
8.5 Young Love and Romantic Relationships 190
8.6 Young Love and Romantic Relationships for People with Disabilities 193
8.7 Friendships, Romantic Relationships and EI 195
Resources 196
References 197
9 Workplace Emotions 203
9.1 Introduction 203
9.2 The Importance of EI in the Workplace 203
9.3 Workplace Stress and Conflicts 207
9.3.1 Workplace Conflicts 208
9.4 The Emotional Climate of the Workplace 211
9.5 Workplace Politics 213
9.5.1 Harmful Workplace Politics 213
9.5.2 Helpful Workplace Politics 215
9.5.3 Perceptions of Workplace Politics 216
9.6 Workplace Bullying 217
9.6.1 What is Workplace Bullying? 218
9.6.2 Factors Contributing to Workplace Bullying 218
9.6.3 Why Do People Bully? 219
9.7 Workplace Wellbeing 220
References 224
10 EI and Work-Life Balance 231
10.1 Introduction 231
10.2 What Is Work-Life Balance? 231
10.2.1 Factors Determining Work-Life Balance 232
10.2.2 Theories on Work-Life Balance 235
10.3 Work-Life Balance and Parenthood 238
10.3.1 Working Parents and Work-Life Balance 239
10.3.2 Single Parents and Work-Life Balance 241
10.3.3 Challenges Faced by Single Dads 241
10.3.4 Challenges Faced by Single Mums 242
10.3.5 Supporting Single Parents in Finding Work-Life Balance 243
10.3.6 At the Social, Community and Governmental Level 244
10.4 Work-Life Balance for Students 245
10.4.1 Study and Life Balance for Schoolchildren and Adolescents 246
10.4.2 Study-Work-Family Demands on University Students 247
10.4.3 Study-Work-Family Demands on International Students 247
10.4.4 Study-Work-Family Demands on Married Couples and Parents 248
10.4.5 Coping Strategies and Support 248
10.5 Using EI to Strike a Work-Life Balance 249
10.5.1 EI and Workplace Burnout 250
10.5.2 EI and Aspects of Work-Life Balance 250
10.5.3 EI and the Caring Industry 251
10.5.4 How Organisations Can Help Employees Find Work-Life Balance 252
References 253
11 Leadership and Emotional Intelligence 260
11.1 Introduction 260
11.2 What Is Leadership? 260
11.3 EI and Leadership 263
11.3.1 Models of EI 263
11.3.2 Why Is EI Important in Leadership? 264
11.4 Leading with EI 265
11.4.1 Visionary Leadership 265
11.4.2 Commanding Leadership 266
11.4.3 Democratic Leadership 267
11.4.4 Coaching Leadership 268
11.4.5 Pace-Setting Leadership 269
11.4.6 Affiliative Leadership 271
11.5 The Dark Side of Leadership 271
11.5.1 What Is Dark Leadership? 272
11.5.2 Factors Steering Leaders to the Dark Side 273
11.5.3 Types of Dark Leadership 274
11.5.4 A Trait Approach to Understanding Dark Leadership 275
11.5.5 How Leadership Strengths Can Turn Malicious 276
11.6 How to Prevent Leaders from Being Drawn to the Dark Side 277
11.6.1 Self-Directed Learning to Boost EI 277
11.6.2 Organisational Input to Boost EI 278
References 280
12 Practice Guide and Strategies to Increase EI 283
12.1 Introduction 283
12.2 Self-Awareness 283
12.3 Other Awareness (Social Intelligence) 287
12.3.1 The Neuroscience of Social Intelligence 287
12.3.2 The Different Aspects of Social Intelligence 288
12.3.3 Empathy 290
12.3.4 Social Skills 291
12.4 Self-Management 294
12.4.1 Self-Control 294
12.4.2 Honesty and Transparency 295
12.4.3 Adaptability 295
12.4.4 Achievement 296
12.4.5 Optimism 297
12.5 Organizational Awareness 298
12.6 Relational Management 299
Resources 300
References 301
13 Emotional Intelligence and Adolescent Mental Health 305
13.1 Introduction 305
13.2 Adolescent Mental Health and EI 305
13.2.1 Eating Disorders 306
13.2.2 Digital Addiction 307
13.2.3 School Bullying 309
13.2.4 Substance Abuse 310
13.2.5 Teen Depression and Suicidal Thoughts 311
13.2.6 The School’s Role in Promoting Positive Mental Health 312
13.3 EI Models Used in Education 313
13.3.1 Ability Emotional Intelligence (AEI) 313
13.3.2 Traits Emotional Intelligence (TEI) 315
13.3.3 Social Emotional Intelligence (SEI) 317
13.4 EI and Resilience Competency 318
13.4.1 Factors That Affect Mental Health in Children and Adolescents 319
13.4.2 EI and Resilience Competencies That Support Good Mental Health 320
13.5 The School’s Role in Supporting Students’ EI Development 322
13.6 Conclusion 325
Resources 326
References 327
14 School Leadership and Emotional Intelligence 333
14.1 Introduction 333
14.2 Instructional Leadership 333
14.3 Organisational Leadership 335
14.3.1 Capabilities Required by School Leaders in Organisational Leadership 337
14.4 The Era of Collective Leadership 339
14.5 School Leadership and EI 341
14.5.1 The Most Common Challenges Faced by Teachers and School Leaders 341
14.5.2 Challenges and Demands at Different Stages of the Professional Journey 345
14.5.3 Transition Challenges from Teaching to School Leadership 348
14.5.4 Transitioning from Mid-Level Leadership to Senior Leadership 351
References 355
15 Emotional Intelligence and the School Community 360
15.1 Introduction 360
15.2 What Is a School Community? 360
15.3 School-Community Collaboration 361
15.4 Building an Emotionally Intelligent School Community 362
15.5 School Leadership in Building Collective EI 363
15.6 Teachers and EI 367
15.6.1 Teachers’ Emotional Competence 367
15.6.2 Supporting Teachers in Conflict Management 369
15.7 Parent-School Partnership 372
15.7.1 Barriers in Parental Involvement 372
15.7.2 Supportive Structures to Enhance Parent-School Partnership 374
15.7.3 Key Elements in Successful Parent-School Partnership 374
15.8 The School Community and Student Leadership 376
15.8.1 Why Is Student Voice Important? 377
15.8.2 Student Leadership: Putting Voice into Action 378
15.8.3 How to Support Student Leadership 379
15.9 Conclusion 380
References 380
16 Helping Students to Develop Emotional Intelligence 386
16.1 Introduction 386
16.2 Teacher Efficacy in Facilitating SEL in School Education 387
16.2.1 Classroom Conflicts 392
16.2.2 Effective Conflict Management Strategies 393
16.3 What Should Schools Focus on to Increase Students’ EI? 394
16.4 Current EI Programs Used in Schools Worldwide 397
16.4.1 Digital Games for SEL 399
16.5 Practical Teaching Strategies 402
16.6 Conclusion 406
References 407