How to Flourish as a Psychotherapist

Professor Brett Kahr has worked in the mental health profession for over forty years. A clinical registrant of both the British Psychoanalytic Council and the United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy, he is Senior Fellow at the Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology in London and, also, Visiting Professor of Psychoanalysis and Mental Health at Regent’s University London. Over the decades, Kahr has worked in the National Health Service and in private practice in Central London with both individuals and couples. He is currently Consultant Psychotherapist to The Balint Consultancy and, additionally, Consultant in Psychology at The Bowlby Centre. He also serves as Chair of the Scholars Committee of the British Psychoanalytic Council, as well as Senior Clinical Research Fellow in Psychotherapy and Mental Health at the Centre for Child Mental Health. Professor Kahr is the Honorary Director of Research at Freud Museum London and, also, an Honorary Fellow of the museum. Over many years, he has enjoyed the privilege of a long-standing relationship with this institution, having served as Deputy Director of the International Campaign for the Freud Museum from 1986–1987 and, more recently, as Trustee of both Freud Museum London and of Freud Museum Publications from 2011–2020. In addition to his clinical practice, Kahr has collaborated with the media in order to promote mental health knowledge. Formerly Resident Psychotherapist on BBC2, broadcasting about mental health issues to millions of listeners, he has appeared on over one thousand radio and television programmes. In recognition of his work in this field, he has become Visiting Professor in the Faculty of Media and Communication at Bournemouth University. The United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy recently awarded him an Honorary Fellowship for his contributions to public service. Professor Kahr is the author of sixteen books and series editor of more than seventy-five additional titles on a wide range of subjects. His solo-authored books cover a range of topics, including clinical investigations of extreme psychopathology and forensic mental health, such as his titles Bombs in the Consulting Room: Surviving Psychological Shrapnel and Dangerous Lunatics: Trauma, Criminality, and Forensic Psychotherapy. He has also written on Sex and the Psyche – a Waterstone’s Non-Fiction Bestseller and a chosen title in the Sunday Times Book Club – based on his study of the traumatic, unconscious roots of over 20,000 adult sexual fantasies, as well as Celebrity Mad: Why Otherwise Intelligent People Worship Fame. His historically orientated books include the very first biography of Donald Winnicott, entitled D. W. Winnicott: A Biographical Portrait, which received the Gradiva Award for Biography, as well as the popular titles, Life Lessons from Freud, Tea with Winnicott, and Coffee with Freud. Most recently, he has published Freud’s Pandemics: Surviving Global War, Spanish Flu, and the Nazis – the inaugural title in the new “Freud Museum London Series” of history books – exploring not only how Sigmund Freud navigated the tragedies of his own lifetime but, also, Freud would have handled the Covid-19 pandemic and what lessons our world leaders might learn from those pioneering psychoanalytical concepts. Kahr had the pleasure of working closely with Kate Pearce and Fernando Marques during their early careers at the old Karnac Books and is now delighted to have published his book How to Flourish as a Psychotherapist with Phoenix Publishing House. In addition to his writing of books, Kahr also serves as Consulting Editor to The International Journal of Forensic Psychotherapy and, also, as Consultant Historian to the journal Attachment: New Directions in Psychotherapy and Relational Psychoanalysis, as well as Consultant to the Board of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis, the journal of Tavistock Relationships. Professor Brett Kahr has worked in the mental health profession for over forty years. A clinical registrant of both the British Psychoanalytic Council and the United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy, he is Senior Fellow at the Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology in London and, also, Visiting Professor of Psychoanalysis and Mental Health at Regent’s University London. Over the decades, Kahr has worked in the National Health Service and in private practice in Central London with both individuals and couples. He is currently Consultant Psychotherapist to The Balint Consultancy and, additionally, Consultant in Psychology at The Bowlby Centre. He also serves as Chair of the Scholars Committee of the British Psychoanalytic Council, as well as Senior Clinical Research Fellow in Psychotherapy and Mental Health at the Centre for Child Mental Health. Professor Kahr is the Honorary Director of Research at Freud Museum London and, also, an Honorary Fellow of the museum. Over many years, he has enjoyed the privilege of a long-standing relationship with this institution, having served as Deputy Director of the International Campaign for the Freud Museum from 1986–1987 and, more recently, as Trustee of both Freud Museum London and of Freud Museum Publications from 2011–2020. In addition to his clinical practice, Kahr has collaborated with the media in order to promote mental health knowledge. Formerly Resident Psychotherapist on BBC2, broadcasting about mental health issues to millions of listeners, he has appeared on over one thousand radio and television programmes. In recognition of his work in this field, he has become Visiting Professor in the Faculty of Media and Communication at Bournemouth University. The United Kingdom Council for Psychotherapy recently awarded him an Honorary Fellowship for his contributions to public service. Professor Kahr is the author of sixteen books and series editor of more than seventy-five additional titles on a wide range of subjects. His solo-authored books cover a range of topics, including clinical investigations of extreme psychopathology and forensic mental health, such as his titles Bombs in the Consulting Room: Surviving Psychological Shrapnel and Dangerous Lunatics: Trauma, Criminality, and Forensic Psychotherapy. He has also written on Sex and the Psyche – a Waterstone’s Non-Fiction Bestseller and a chosen title in the Sunday Times Book Club – based on his study of the traumatic, unconscious roots of over 20,000 adult sexual fantasies, as well as Celebrity Mad: Why Otherwise Intelligent People Worship Fame. His historically orientated books include the very first biography of Donald Winnicott, entitled D. W. Winnicott: A Biographical Portrait, which received the Gradiva Award for Biography, as well as the popular titles, Life Lessons from Freud, Tea with Winnicott, and Coffee with Freud. Most recently, he has published Freud’s Pandemics: Surviving Global War, Spanish Flu, and the Nazis – the inaugural title in the new “Freud Museum London Series” of history books – exploring not only how Sigmund Freud navigated the tragedies of his own lifetime but, also, Freud would have handled the Covid-19 pandemic and what lessons our world leaders might learn from those pioneering psychoanalytical concepts. Kahr had the pleasure of working closely with Kate Pearce and Fernando Marques during their early careers at the old Karnac Books and is now delighted to have published his book How to Flourish as a Psychotherapist with Phoenix Publishing House. In addition to his writing of books, Kahr also serves as Consulting Editor to The International Journal of Forensic Psychotherapy and, also, as Consultant Historian to the journal Attachment: New Directions in Psychotherapy and Relational Psychoanalysis, as well as Consultant to the Board of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis, the journal of Tavistock Relationships. Professor Brett Kahr has worked in the mental health profession for over forty years. He is Senior Fellow at the Tavistock Institute of Medical Psychology in London and, also, Senior Clinical Research Fellow in Psychotherapy and Mental Health at the Centre for Child Mental Health. He holds posts as Consultant to The Bowlby Centre and, also, as Consultant Psychotherapist to The Balint Consultancy. Having worked for many years in the National Health Service, he currently maintains a private practice in Hampstead, North London, for individuals and couples. Professor Kahr is a Trustee of the Freud Museum London and of Freud Museum Publications, and he is also a trained historian with a special concentration in the history of psychoanalysis. Author or editor of eleven books, his titles include, D.W. Winnicott: A Biographical Portrait, which received the Gradiva Award for Biography; Sex and the Psyche, which became a chosen title in the Sunday Times Book Club and which appeared in serial form in both The Times and The Observer; Tea with Winnicott, selected as one of the “Books of the Year” in The Guardian newspaper; Coffee with Freud; and, most recently, New Horizons in Forensic Psychotherapy: Exploring the Work of Estela V. Welldon, an edited Festschrift in honour of Dr Welldon’s eightieth birthday. He has served as series editor for over fifty-five further titles in his capacity as Series Editor of the “Forensic Psychotherapy Monograph Series” and, also, as Series Co-Editor for both the “History of Psychoanalysis Series” and the “Library of Couple and Family Psychoanalysis”, all published by Routledge.

 












INTRODUCTION

Survival may not be enough



Part One

Building a Secure Base



CHAPTER ONE

A Noble, Complicated Passion

Mouthwash for the Mind

Zyklon B Gas in the Consulting Room

Friends with Oesophageal Cancer and Vascular Dementia









CHAPTER TWO

Assessing One’s Own Sanity

The Perfect Candidate

Pathological Motivations

Can We Afford to Train?



CHAPTER THREE

On Marrying a Library

Bibliophilia Psychotherapeutica

Curling Up with Sigmund Freud

My Three Favourite Reading Rooms



CHAPTER FOUR

The Joys and Pitfalls of Training

A Child in a Sweet Shop

Exhausted, Frazzled, and Scrutinised

Legitimate at Last



CHAPTER FIVE

Cultivating Brilliant Mentors

Dis-identifying from Disappointing Tutors

A Most Inspiring Lecturer from Mendoza

A Great Teacher Under Whom I Never Studied



Part Two

The Art of Prospering



CHAPTER SIX

Perpetual Pupils

Training Never Ends

How to Be a Medieval Monk

Swimming in Organisations



CHAPTER SEVEN

Attracting Referrals

The Art of Advertising

My Last 500 Patients

Answering the Telephone



CHAPTER EIGHT

Managing Money

Under-Charging and Over-Charging

Collecting Fees

Financial Planning for the Future









CHAPTER NINE

The Promotion of Expertise

Flagrant Exhibitionism or Neurotic Inhibitionism?

Generativity versus Stagnation

On Stage at the Royal Opera House



CHAPTER TEN

Patients as Persecutors and as Privileges

The Prevention of Burn-Out

Hate in the Countertransference

Delightful, Honourable People



Part Three

Thriving Beyond the Consulting Room



CHAPTER ELEVEN

Nourishing Fledgling Colleagues

Enlivening the Classroom

On Being a Clinical Supervisor

A Little Drink After Work



CHAPTER TWELVE

Public Lecturing

My Very First Paper

The Length of the Applause

Addressing the United Nations



CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Daring to Research

The Humiliation of Edward Glover

A Search for the Traumatic Origins of Psychosis

Sexual Fantasies at the Dinner Table



CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Writing Articles and Books

The Agony of 300 Words and the Ease of 300,000

Publishing as a Relational Experience

“Not Another Book on Projective Identification”



CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Blue-Sky Projects

Freud Thinks Big

A Bestseller and a Serial Killer

Psychotherapists in Prison and in the Middle East









Part Four

Surviving Success



CHAPTER SIXTEEN

Avoiding Isolation

The Need for Solitude

Beware the Ethics Committee

Choosing the Best Dinner Parties



CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Navigating Envy

Winnicott’s Mutterings in Geneva

Thank God I’m Overweight

On Being Provocative



CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

Nurturing the Ageing Spine

The Ultimate Narcissistic Injury

The Ten-Minute Gymnasium

Lounging on the Beach



CHAPTER NINETEEN

Embracing Idiosyncrasy

Conquering Creative Entanglements

Mourning Unfulfilled Dreams

The Maverick in Mental Health



CHAPTER TWENTY

Preparing for Death

The Appointment of Clinical Executors

How to Retire Properly

On the Shaping of a Legacy



EPILOGUE

My Parting Thoughts



Acknowledgements

About the author

References

Index