Awaking Hope (eBook)

Chapter Two

While I Was Sleeping

Later I would piece together that it took many weeks for me to wake up.

Weeks, before I could describe to people the terror of each incremental stage of consciousness, first the awareness of being, then of being human; of remembering myself, all while encased in a senseless, disembodied black world. Then, recovering sound and perceiving the world around me, until finally, my mind reconnected to my body, and I could feel.

Weeks, before I would remember the sun on my face and a light, crisp breeze from the outside world as it went on without me. So many weeks before I would recognize the sound of people attending to me -of strangers sitting with me to read or tell me an old story.

I felt content to stay like this, the world washing over me, people caring for me while I slept. Perhaps I would’ve stayed like that forever if it hadn’t been for one very persistent soul that refused to let me.

I was half-awake, as I had been many times before, just long enough to notice a few sounds or a fragment of conversation. This would soon exhaust me and drive me back into the comforting oblivion of sleep. It might have been the same today if not for a golden retriever named Max.

Sensing I was conscious, he proceeded to lick my face, which prevented me from slipping away again. I groaned and averted my head away from that wet, persistent tongue.

“Ughck,” I gurgled. Startling everyone in the room, including myself.

A girl’s voice cried out in her most adult-sounding scold, “Maximillian, stop that!”

A different person hurried to my bedside and excitedly directed the girl to go and call someone. “Hope? Hope are you with us?”

I felt her soft, warm hand on my arm. “Good boy Max! Good boy,” and I smiled at the idea of a dog in a hospital. Curious to see the sweet pup now bathing my left hand, I cracked one eye open.

“Ungh,” I grunted again and snapped the eye shut to block out the painful light.

“Brigh...” I tried again, “Ligh ss brigh....”

Luckily, the cheerful woman understood my slurred speech.

“Of course, that light’s too bright, isn’t it?”

“Mmmhmm,” I answered as she rustled around.

“There, I dimmed the light. Can you try again?”

Cautiously I opened the same eye again and found that it didn’t hurt to keep it open this time. As my other eye followed, I could just make out a couple of fuzzy shapes hovering in a doorway a few yards away.

“Huh-low?” I said, rolling my head fully in that direction. I blinked my eyes a few times, trying to focus on things around me. A backlit form handed something to another dark blob before calmly entering my room.

“Well now, I heard a rumor that our own sleeping beauty was awake and talking.” A soothing male voice said, “I’m not sure I believe it!”

My eyes were less blurry now, and with him so close, I could see teasing twinkling eyes peering at me from under bushy grey eyebrows. Like I was watching some kind of reality show, I just stared at him, silently waiting for him to say something else. His pleasant voice reminded me of kindly old men from childhood T.V. dramas. I half expected him to pull out a harmonica or launch into a story about days long gone.

He didn’t do any of that, of course. His smile faltered when I didn’t respond, and he looked questioningly at the older lady still by my side.

“Oh yes, she’s awake, just a little disoriented. Isn’t that right, Hope?” The motherly, silver-haired woman said with a doting smile.

Returning her smile, I nodded a little too vigorously. “Ungh. Owww,” and closed my eyes against the dull headache.

The doctor, upbeat once again, came to the rescue. “Well, that’s to be expected now, isn’t it? How’s about I give you a little something for your head- nothing too strong though, don’t want you going right back to sleep again.” He paused and then said, “now, how’s that feel? Better?”

“Yes, but...?”

Startled by how fast he had administered something, I searched for an explanation and noticed the IV in my arm.

The smiling woman tugged Max away, and with a little wave, she bustled toward the door. “I guess I should get going; the kids will be wondering where Max is.”

As I watched her leave, I noted that my vision was now much clearer. Glancing around the cozy room, I blurted out, surprised, “Is all this stuff from my house?”

“Hmm? What, oh,” he said, peering around as if he was the one seeing the room for the first time. “Well, it sure does seem that way, but I’m not sure.” He said frustratingly. I found his old-timey ‘aw shucks’ manner a little irritating and fought the urge to ask him, ‘what did he know?’ Instead, I didn’t say anything, following my mom’s old advice ‘if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.’ Thinking of my mom made my eyes prickle with a few hot tears, which surprised me, as she had been gone so many years.

The kindly doctor mistook my reaction as having to do with the furniture. Attempting to reassure me, he said, “I’m sure someone around here knows, we’ll find out, don’t you worry.”

“Now!” He said, with an efficiency at odds with his laid-back grandpa demeanor. “Let’s do a proper check-up on you, shall we?” He unwrapped a tongue depressor from his pocket. “Say ahhhh.”

Something about it seemed almost a little rehearsed, like we were performing a stage play, but I brushed it off. I was in the hospital, and judging by the lived-in feel of the room, I had been here for a long while. My brain was struggling to catch up, which would explain why things seemed a shade off from normal.

“Everything looks good here, young lady; I think you just need a little time to acclimate. and you should feel back to your old self in no time.” He said, putting his light back in his coat pocket.

Having thought about my mother had led to a flood of questions. Where am I? What happened? Is my family here? How long had I been here? Despite that, I only managed to ask “What...?” before the kind old doctor cut me off.

“Right now, I need you to relax and take it slow, I’ve contacted your doctor, and she should be here soon.”

“My doctor? But I don’t go to a regular doctor.”

Do I even have insurance? I couldn’t remember. In fact, the more I tried to recall details about my life, the more I realized I couldn’t quite remember a lot of things. Thoughts full of answers seemed to be playing hide-and-seek with me, slipping away around a corner, just out of reach. It made my head start to ache again.

Before the doctor could say anything else, a woman burst into the room. Stopping halfway in, she asked in a breathless voice, “Tom?” Searching his face intently she then turned her focus to me with a piercing look, before glancing back to Tom.

He greeted the woman with a big smile and said something like, “no deficits.” The woman relaxed and took a few tentative steps towards me. Cocking her head to the side, she regarded me a moment before a beaming smile lit her face.

Without breaking her gaze, she said, “I got here as fast as I could. Thanks, Tom; I really appreciate you being here.”

He walked over and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

“Her vitals are excellent; she’s alert... and just bursting with questions.”

Turning back to me with a bright smile to match the one the woman wore, he said, “Well, my dear, you’re in good hands now. It was very nice to meet you; I hope I’ll see you again soon- although under better circumstances next time, yes?”

To both of us, he gave one last nod, “I’ll leave you ladies to it then,” and left.

As the door closed behind him, I could hear a flurry of activity coming from the hall and what sounded like excited and hushed voices. It couldn’t be because of me, could it?

My doctor had dark brown hair, casually gathered in a ponytail. Wisps of hair had escaped and were floating around her head, framing her face in a wild pixie-like way. She was one of those petite and wiry women that always appeared very efficient to me whether they were or not. I would guess she was, though, being a doctor.

It had been a few long seconds, and she had yet to say anything to me. My eyebrows rose, and I gave her a pointed look. It didn’t deter her one iota. She wasn’t about to be rushed and continued smiling- maybe a little gentler now, though. Then, she nodded as if answering a silent question in her head.

“Welcome back, Hope; it’s very nice to, ah, meet you.”

I wondered why she hesitated before the word ‘meet.’ But I didn’t dwell on it because it was clear that something terrible had happened to me. The way everyone treated me- so carefully like you would a small child. Alarm bells were going off in my head,...