Surviving

When survivors of domestic violence reveal their predicaments, the first question many ask is, “Why did you stay?” Here, an abuse survivor answers that question through her own story of survival and offers help to those who want, and need, to leave.

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A revealing look at why domestic abuse victims stay with their abusers…and how they can ultimately leave. And survive.

One Saturday morning, Gooden is woken up by her husband shoving her off the bed for no discernible reason.

Despite her quick thinking and even quicker footsteps, her husband catches her, his sudden anger unfathomable. No words are exchanged. He strangles her nearly to death.

With unflinching vulnerability, Gooden outlines in painstaking detail what she had to do to walk away and live and how others can learn from her experiences, from skimming the grocery money, to squirreling away personal belongings, to navigating domestic violence shelters. She offers strategies for overcoming the barriers survivors often come up against, such as money, logistics, social circles, or, most powerfully: love. Uniquely compassionate when it comes to the heartbreak of still loving one’s abuser, Gooden shares how she transformed and extended this love outward, using her story to encourage others to share their own. The voice and fire behind the #WhyIStayed, Bev Gooden is uniquely positioned to explore the many reasons women stay in abusive relationships, and how they can muster the resources and motivation to leave.

Surviving is unlike any memoir of survivorship, given its nuance, compassion, and candor. Above all, it is an exquisitely powerful testament to Gooden’s healing, survivorship, and dedication to helping others do the same.