The Unofficial Princess Bride Cookbook

Cassandra Reeder is an avid home cook and lifetime geek. For over a decade, she has been helping other geeks and nerds all over the world make their fictional food fantasies come true at geekychef.com. Cassandra extended this mission as the author of the Geeky Chef cookbook series, which includes: The Geeky Chef Cookbook, The Geeky Chef Strikes Back, The Geeky Chef Drinks, and The Geeky Bartender Drinks. She is also the author of The Unofficial Princess Bride Cookbook. Cassandra currently lives in Portland, Oregon.

INTRODUCTION
Booooooze!
DRINKS AND COCKTAILS
Vizzini’s Iocane Fizzini
Fire Swamp Flame Spurt
Dead Pirate Robert’s “No Survivors” Bumbo
Vengeful Spaniard’s Sangria
“Mostly Dead” Corpse Reviver
“Cliffs of Insanity” Shot
The Brut Squad
“The Sea After a Storm” Dark and Stormy
Four White Horses
Not a Witch’s Brew
Are you just ladling around with me or what?
SOUPS AND STEWS
Fezzik’s Restorative Stew
Florinese “Mawidge” Soup
“Unemployed in Greenland” Suaasat
Farm Boy Stew
Grandfather’s Matzo Ball Soup
Do you always begin meals this way?
APPETIZERS AND ACCOMPANIMENTS
“Not a Lot of Money in Revenge” Beggar’s Purses
“Life is Pain” Pandemain
Arancini à la Vizzini
Fiery Spanish Croquetas
Gentle Giant’s Gargantuan Gougères
Six-Fingered Man Skewers (Rugen’s Flammkuchen)
“Battle of Wits” Brie and Apple Crostini
The National Dish of Florin
Swordmasters’ Fon-Duel
Have You the Wings?
Prepare to dine!
MAIN COURSES
Pre-Torture Nourishment
Buttercup’s Perfect (Chicken) Breasts
The Albino’s MLT: Mutton, Lettuce, Tomato
Roasted R.O.U.S.
Shrieking Eel Pie
Hippopotamic Land Mass Lollipops
The Capo Farro Technique
The Pirate Ship Revenge Salmagundi
Humperdinck’s Crown Roast
The Machine’s Excruciating Tourtière
I’ll eat you both apart!
I’ll bake you both together!
CAKES, PIES, AND TARTS
Princess Buttercups
Flaming Fezzik Flambé
“As You Wish” Appeltaart
Princess Bridal Cake
Have Fun Storming the Chastletes!
Skip to the end . . .
OTHER DESSERTS AND CANDIES
Clever Sicilian’s “Inconceivable!” Dessert
Miracle Max’s Chocolate-Covered Miracle Pill
Anybody Want a Peanut (Buttercup?)
Man in Black’s “No One to Be Trifled With” Trifle
Lightning Sand Parfait
Hello Lady(fingers)!
Kissing Book Kisses
Oh, You Mean THIS Gate Key (Lime Posset)!
Twu Wuv Twuffles
Cherry Pits of Despair
VEGAN, VEGETARIAN, AND KOSHER REPLACEMENTS
PARTY PLANNING
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
INDEX