The Pastor's Family - Harold G Koenig, Daniel L Langford

The Pastor's Family

The Challenges of Family Life and Pastoral Responsibilities
Buch | Softcover
194 Seiten
1998
Routledge (Verlag)
978-0-7890-0585-4 (ISBN)
67,30 inkl. MwSt
Describing the difficulties of balancing a career and family life, The Pastor’s Family: The Challenges of Family Life and Pastoral Responsibilities is a personal narrative that discusses the all-too-familiar practice of neglecting your family for your job. Pastors will learn the importance of balancing time and attention between their families and religious careers by exploring the problems caused by one pastor’s prolonged absence from home. Containing research and first-hand experiences, The Pastor’s Family calls for a change in ministry policies that will enable pastors to devote as much time to their families as they do to their congregations.Containing stories and anecdotes from the author, his wife, and his two children, this book offers suggestions on how to improve the physical, emotional, and spiritual health of a pastor’s family. The information and insight provided by The Pastor’s Family will also help pastors’wives realize that they are not alone in their demanding roles and will help church policymakers discover the need to improve relations between the congregation and the pastor’s family. With the hope that the universal problems of pastors’families will be revealed, the author shares with you methods that have helped bring him and his family closer together, including:



understanding the expectations of the stereotypical “superpastor” and learning how to set boundaries between family life and career
realizing that a pastor’s family is subject to the same problems and challenges other families face and helping your family deal with this pressure
learning the various definitions of codependency and how this can attribute to the neglect of your family
discussing the history of abuse of pastors’families through the Bible and famous religious figures
recognizing the discrimination of a pastor’s wife and her sufferings, such as coping with her husband’s various psychological challenges and being expected to always help her husband with his career
discovering how conflicts can provoke communication, release emotions, identify and clarify problems, and permit individualization
understanding why people feel a loss of power or personal rejection when their requests are not grantedEmphasizing the practice of setting boundaries, The Pastor’s Family examines ways to promote assertiveness through self-talk and self-differentiation that will help you defeat codependent behavior. This will teach you that it is all right to say “no”-- that it is all right to do things for yourself. From The Pastor’s Family, you will learn how to correct the ideology that makes many pastors feel they must honor every parishioner request, despite the effect it will have on his family. Through stories of hardship and personal revelations, this book will help you realize the need for church policy reforms that will allow pastors to be looked upon as humans who have familiesbesides their parishioners.

Harold G Koenig, Daniel L Langford

Contents
Foreword



Preface
Section I: The Pastor and His Spouse
Chapter 1. “Where’s Dad?” “Where’s My Husband?”
Pastor Abandons Family for the Ministry
Hazards of Neglect
Toward a New Model of Ministry
Chapter 2. The Experience of Being a Pastor’s Wife
History and Crisis
Diana’s Story
The Outcome of Crisis
Chapter 3. Who Is Going to Make the Coffee?
Role Reversal
The Pastor’s Wife as Caretaker
Summary
Section II: The Pastor and His Children
Chapter 4. My P.K.’s: Their Stories
My Life as a Preacher’s Child: Daniel Aaron Langford
My Reflections on Dan Aaron’s and Deanna’s Stories
Deanna’s Story
Reflection on My Children and Our Relationship
Section III: The Pastor and His Family
Chapter 5. The Bible, Nature, Human, and Church History: Warnings and Mandates for Family Nurture
Biblical References to the Family and Their Implications for the Pastor’s Family
The Biological Purpose of Marriage
The Responsibility of Parenthood
Sad Tales of Neglect
Responsibility for Change
Chapter 6. Treasure in Family Discontent
A Fresh Look at Family Conflict
Healthy Communication and the Pastor’s Family
More Freedom for the Pastor’s Family
Section IV: The Pastor and Personal Recovery
Chapter 7. The Pastor and Codependency: Coming to Terms with the Dark Side of the Call to Ministry
What Is Codependency?
My Family of Origins
The Army of Helpers
From Codependency to the Love of God
Freedom from Codependency with the Congregation
Chapter 8. Setting Boundaries and Learning to Say “No”: Benchmarks for Healthy Relationships Between the Pastor, His Family, and the Congregation
“No” Creates Upset
Setting Boundaries Means Being Comfortable with Assertive Behavior
Limit Setting and Scripture
How I Am Setting Limits
The Problem of “No”
Section V: The Pastor and Growth
Chapter 9. The Minister’s Family Life: A Laboratory of Valuable Experience
Biblical Perspectives
How My Family Has Been a Laboratory for Personal/Pastoral Growth
SectionVI : The Pastor and Spiritual Formation
Chapter 10. Spiritual Formation: Giving and Receiving Prayer
Prologue
A New Window of Prayer
A New Opportunity for Prayer and Intimacy with God
Personal Intercessors
The Search for a Spiritual Director
My Family and Spiritual Growth
Chapter 11. Setbacks, Heartbreaks, and New Opportunities
The Original Setting
The Heat of the Desert
A Long, Dark Night of Wandering and Loss
A Trip That Changed Our Destiny
Hope Frustrated Again
Hope Renewed
A New Opportunity for Ministry
A Balanced Ministry and a Balanced Family
Balance in My Marriage and Family
A Reflection on Pastoral Ministry from the Back Pew
Epilogue
Notes
Bibliography
Index

Erscheint lt. Verlag 7.10.1998
Verlagsort New York
Sprache englisch
Maße 148 x 210 mm
Gewicht 360 g
Themenwelt Religion / Theologie Christentum Kirchengeschichte
Religion / Theologie Christentum Pastoraltheologie
ISBN-10 0-7890-0585-9 / 0789005859
ISBN-13 978-0-7890-0585-4 / 9780789005854
Zustand Neuware
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