CHAPTER TWO
Getting to Know the Lord
I’ve always had a fascination with history. When I was young, I thoroughly enjoyed reading about the presidents of the United States. Out of all the presidents, I was particularly interested in Theodore Roosevelt. In an effort to get to know more about him, I sought out pictures, books, and material on his life. As a result, I was able to learn a great deal about him.
Despite getting to know much about President Theodore Roosevelt, however, I never was able to know him as a person. I couldn’t ask him questions or be in his presence because he died many years before I was born. Although I knew many facts about him, it was not possible for me to have a personal relationship with Theodore Roosevelt.
Unfortunately, many of us treat Jesus in the same way. We know that he lived two thousand years ago, we know some facts about his life, we are even familiar with things that he said—and it ends there. We make the mistake of treating him just like any other historical figure. We do not even consider the fact that it is possible to have a personal relationship with him.
Thinking that we can’t have a personal relationship with Jesus could not be further from the truth. Furthermore, if we want to be able to make decisions in accordance with Jesus’s will, we absolutely must get to know him personally. The good news is that, even though the idea can seem intimidating, we can all have a relationship with Jesus by following a few simple steps.
For most of my life, my relationship with Jesus was not a good one. Even though I went to Mass every week, I viewed him as a cross between a historical figure and an “imaginary friend.” I accepted the fact that he did exist, was crucified, rose from the dead, and ascended into heaven. I was even able to quote some of the things he said. I even prayed on occasion, or at least went through the motions.
I did know where to find Jesus when I needed a favor. Having heard stories of answered prayers and even miracles in the lives of others, I thought that I should pray when I needed something. After all, Jesus said that if we ask, we’ll receive. Praying for my needs was a matter of covering all the bases.
Fortunately, although it took me many years, I came to discover that it is possible to have a personal relationship with Jesus. What’s even more amazing is that he wants this relationship more than I do! “Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if any one hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me” (Revelation 3:20).
Even though Jesus wants to become intimate friends with us, isn’t it incredible that he won’t force us to respond to his offer? Despite the fact that friendship with Christ is the answer to achieving peace, discovering his will for our lives, and getting to heaven, he won’t force us to become his friends. If we choose to ignore him, as I did for many years, he will let us.
Jesus will stand at our door, knock, and wait patiently for us to invite him into our lives. Once we open the door and allow him to come inside, great things will happen. In the remainder of this chapter, we’ll explore some practical ways for getting to know Jesus personally.
PRAY!
What exactly is a personal relationship? Simply put, it’s a relationship between two individuals. In order for this relationship to develop and grow, two-way communication is needed. The fact that you’re reading my words doesn’t necessarily mean that you and I have a personal relationship. In order for a relationship to exist, both parties need to express themselves to one another.
A relationship with Jesus works in exactly the same way. While your relationship with the Lord should also involve responding to his unconditional love by loving him in return, the basic thing needed is communication. If you speak to Jesus and he speaks to you, a personal relationship does exist. While your relationship shouldn’t end there, this two-way communication provides a foundation on which to build.
Now that we’re aware that Jesus is knocking on our door, how do we go about opening the door and letting him in? It all begins with prayer. If we want to know the Lord, we absolutely and positively must speak to him in prayer. Furthermore, if we are going to have a good personal relationship with Jesus, we must pray every day. If you only remember one thing from this chapter, this is it! It is impossible to have a good personal relationship with Jesus without daily prayer.
No matter how much we desire to do God’s will, we will encounter days when we don’t want to pray. While there is nothing wrong with having those feelings (they are neither right nor wrong), there is something wrong with letting our emotions drive our spiritual life. In order to develop and maintain a good personal relationship with Christ, daily prayer is a necessity.
Even after making a commitment to spend time in prayer each day, there are many questions that can arise. What’s the best way to pray? When should I pray? How many times do I have to pray each day?
While there can be many answers to such questions, I would like to share what works for me. I have wrestled with these questions over the years and have found that some methods are more effective than others.
The most important thing to remember is that prayer should be a conversation with the Lord. We should never lose sight of the fact that, when we pray, he is listening. This intimate conversation can exist whether we use formal prayers or our own words. I have found that a combination of formal and spontaneous prayer works best for me.
People sometimes refrain from formal prayers (such as the Our Father or Hail Mary) because they feel that such prayers don’t allow for a meaningful conversation. I strongly disagree. When one of his disciples asked Jesus, “Lord, teach us to pray,” he responded by reciting the Lord’s Prayer (see Luke 11:1–4). How could a prayer composed by Jesus be ineffective or meaningless?
I pray the Our Father several times throughout the day and find that it helps me overcome one of my big weaknesses. When I pray, I have a tendency to focus on myself. My natural instinct is to concentrate mainly on my needs and wants. And while the Lord certainly wants us to present him with our needs and desires, it is more important to concentrate on his desires.
As soon as I pray the opening words, “Our Father,” I’m reminded that he’s not just my Father. I’m also praying on behalf of his other children around the world. Then, turning my attention to “hallowed be thy name,” I offer prayers of praise to Almighty God. I then proceed to pray that his will be done on earth, just as it is in heaven. It’s only then that I ask him to “give us this day our daily bread.”
Again, the words us and our imply that this prayer is bigger than me. I’m praying that the starving children in the world can have food to eat before the day is over. I’m praying that the financially strapped single mother can pay her rent. And I’m praying that the Lord will continue to nourish us with his very Body, Blood, soul, and divinity in the Eucharist.
I conclude my prayer by asking that we all be kept free from temptation and be delivered from evil. What an awesome privilege! I am asking the Lord to grant everyone in the world the grace that they need to get to heaven.
There is no doubt that we can use formal prayers incorrectly. Perhaps we simply recite the words rather than praying from the heart. Yet, the benefits of the Our Father and other formal prayers far outweigh that risk.
In addition to formal prayers, I also speak to the Lord using my own words. What do I say? Anything that comes to mind! I tell him that I love him, I thank him for the many blessings in my life, I ask for the strength to deal with difficult situations, and I share my thoughts with him. I have to admit that this was difficult for me at first, but it gets easier each day.
If the idea of speaking to Jesus in a conversational way seems foreign to you, I recommend that you start slowly and ask him to help you. Because we depend so much on our senses, most of us find it difficult to communicate with a person we cannot see. That’s perfectly understandable, but this can change over time. What you need to remember is that you are not conversing with an imaginary friend when you are speaking to the Lord. You are having a conversation with someone who is very real.
Jesus wants to communicate with you as well. Even though it may not feel like it, speaking with the Lord always involves reciprocation on his part. He may speak mysteriously, he may speak in silence, or sometimes you may even be able to audibly hear his words. However he speaks, you can rest assured that Jesus will not ignore you.
Over time, you will feel Jesus’s presence more and more in your prayer. In the meantime, make sure that you speak to Jesus throughout the day. If you don’t feel like it or...