Just Like You (eBook)
eBook Download:
EPUB
2020
|
1. Auflage
278 Seiten
Bookbaby (Verlag)
978-1-0983-4346-0 (ISBN)
278 Seiten
Bookbaby (Verlag)
978-1-0983-4346-0 (ISBN)
Four friends, Melissa, Jenn, Olivia, and Makayla come together whenever they can. They all felt they had a strong bond, until one woman in the group shows how destructive one can be to themselves and others when childhood trauma isn't acknowledged or dealt with. Stabbed in the back. These ladies have to choose to stick together through thick and thin or go their separate ways.
Melissa, Makayla, Jenn and Olivia are all good friends. They find time in their lives to get together and check on one another when a shoulder to lean on is needed. Melissa tries to balance loving herself, finding her worth, and letting go of childhood traumas. If or when love comes her way, Melissa hopes to never lose herself in loving a man ever again. Makayla has dealt with so much that only a few individuals know about. She's torn between holding on to her marriage or her secret lover who has been around since she was a little girl. If you love something let it go... Makayla's love has come back into her life that forces her to make a life altering decision. Then there's Jenn, on the outside looking in one would think she had it all together. Only her deceased grandmother knows what Jenn harbors inside. She has abandonment issues and pushes people away before they can make their way to her heart. For her sake and others, she feels that's the best way to be. For years Olivia had to fight. She remembered when her father was alive, she was protected. Olivia's friends are all she has because she comes from a family full of dysfunction and secrets. Olivia discovers her own meaning of life. If it's not one thing it's another. Someone in this group of women gets a reality check when she tries to separate them with her deceitful actions. She learns they're more alike than she'd thought when it's too late. Just Like You
Melissa, Makayla, Jenn and Olivia are all good friends. They find time in their lives to get together and check on one another when a shoulder to lean on is needed. Melissa tries to balance loving herself, finding her worth, and letting go of childhood traumas. If or when love comes her way, Melissa hopes to never lose herself in loving a man ever again. Makayla has dealt with so much that only a few individuals know about. She's torn between holding on to her marriage or her secret lover who has been around since she was a little girl. If you love something let it go... Makayla's love has come back into her life that forces her to make a life altering decision. Then there's Jenn, on the outside looking in one would think she had it all together. Only her deceased grandmother knows what Jenn harbors inside. She has abandonment issues and pushes people away before they can make their way to her heart. For her sake and others, she feels that's the best way to be. For years Olivia had to fight. She remembered when her father was alive, she was protected. Olivia's friends are all she has because she comes from a family full of dysfunction and secrets. Olivia discovers her own meaning of life. If it's not one thing it's another. Someone in this group of women gets a reality check when she tries to separate them with her deceitful actions. She learns they're more alike than she'd thought when it's too late. Just Like You
CHAPTER 2
Two years after that situation, many flings later, I’m still alone. Most of my days are spent busying myself with work, family, and other people’s problems. At night I relax with meditation, the shower head, or the bullet, the rabbit, whichever I felt would get the job done quicker.
I didn’t really want to call myself celibate, but I haven’t had sex in seven months. That’s big for me. I want to say I’ll wait until I’m in a serious relationship, but I don’t see that happening. These men are afraid of commitment. Somedays I wanted a real relationship. Then somedays I felt like I might want to go back to “Good Dick” listed in my phone. So, I ain’t shit either! Honestly, I’m so sick of men!
I’ve been lacking what a man is supposed to do for a woman since I started dating. I had that once and it was short lived. My longest relationship was two and a half years off and on, and he never even treated me like Tre did. I don’t miss Tre, I’m over him. He was just an example of what I felt being loved was like until that ended.
I’ve been reflecting a lot. I try to deny what I’m feeling, but being honest with myself, I’m not happy. I’m so good at making others think that I’m okay, but I cry every single night. I wake up in the morning, push those feelings deep down, and walk out my house.
I come home and fall apart. I can only be vulnerable with myself. I’m tired of talking about a new man, every six months to my friends. Last year, I went to get tested for HIV, and when asked how many men I’d slept with in the past year, I realized I should’ve prepared a list in the car before I walked in. I left the clinic non-reactive. I also walked out feeling empty.
All I ever wanted was to love and be loved back. Do you want to know what I was missing? Loving myself. I remember my dad asking me, “How can you love someone when you don’t love yourself?” My dad was telling me I didn’t love myself often, and I was offended because I was blind to the fact that he was telling the truth.
No matter how much love I felt I had to give to someone it didn’t matter. I take full accountability for my many failed relationships. I’m woman enough to be vulnerable and stop running from myself. I’m also comfortable telling my story in more ways than one, so that I can reach women who are going through the same things I was putting myself through because man… I almost gave up!
Instead of searching for a soulmate, I started searching for my soul, mate. Get it? Really though, I had to make some major changes if I was truly ready for something new. I had to cleanse my mind, body, and soul. After the lease for my apartment was up, I moved into a two-bedroom house. Being in my apartment, I made the mistake of letting too many of my lovers know where I lived.
When I decided to cleanse my space that meant getting rid of lovers, friends, and certain family members. It wasn’t easy; however, it was time for me to be selfish for once and take care of Melissa. I felt like if I couldn’t call people and ask them for the same things they called me for, I would no longer make myself accessible.
Three men showed up to my apartment, because they were cut off. No more of my chocolate chip cookie for them. I felt empowered, and I no longer craved instant gratification.
My parents and my sister Makayla were helping me for the past two days move and decorate. I appreciated them so much, especially my mom, who is an interior designer. She brought my vision of making every room in my home just how I wanted it. Daughter discount, free of charge!
My parents left because they had to work in the morning. Makayla stayed to catch up with me on life and binge watch Insecure on HBO.
“Girl, you and Molly are the same people.” Makayla said while finishing off the rest of her Moscato.
“Yeah, I’ve noticed that too.” I would describe Molly, whose character is played by actress Yvonne Orji, as a strong black woman who wants love now, but refuses to put up with bullshit. She’s a successful woman with a career as a lawyer. From the outside looking in, a person would think she has her life together, but she’s lonely and picky when it comes to men. She expects men to be exactly what she feels she wants and needs in the moment. When they aren’t, then on to the next. She sleeps around when she has needs because she sometimes feels that man for her is nonexistent, but all she really wants is someone to love her, so she can feel complete. Hopefully, season two she learns that love takes time, and no one is perfect. Hell, hopefully in this lifetime I’ll figure that out too!
“It’s okay though. I see the change in you. You know you are what you attract. You were attracting the wrong men because you weren’t even right within. Soon your man will find you.” She told me.
“Says the woman who has been married for three years!” I teased.
Makayla and I are both the same age except she’s four months older than me. We have the same father. We didn’t find out we were related until high school. Makayla’s mom got pregnant here in Georgia. She moved to Seattle for college and stayed there until our dad finally decided he wanted joint custody of Makayla. I guess the fact that she was moving in with my parents and I was the only reason why they would tell us we had a sister.
It was a messy situation that no one in the family ever talked about. I hated Makayla because the whole family smothered her when she moved here. She wasn’t nice, and I thought she was stuck up. She used to always tell me mean things that her mom said about me and my mom. I started to believe it.
We did any and everything to make each other’s life hell. We had different cliques in school too. It wasn’t until the day one of her friends turned on her, that we became close.
“Kayla kept talking about how good his dick was, so I had to finally find out for myself.” I overheard Makayla’s so-called friend Brande bragging about sleeping with her boyfriend Mike.
“Well, was it?” Some girl in a white Aeropostale shirt asked.
“Girl, his dick is so big I couldn’t even take it. He went down on me, but he didn’t know what he was doing. I thought older dudes were more experienced. Anyways, her pussy gotta be loose as hell! I gave him head. I wrapped these thick lips right around it. I’m not a bopper though.” Brande looked in the mirror, applied lip-gloss, and licked her lips.
“You gonna tell Kayla?” Another girl asked. I think her name was Alicia. I’m not sure.
Brande looked at her, “No, Ima just tell everyone in the group and when I randomly laugh everyone will know except her.” They all laughed. “Hey, do you think Kayla is prettier than I am?” Her friends grew quiet.
“No, her black ass is not prettier than you! The only reason she’s in our clique is because she’s cute to be dark skin and dress nice. You’re prettier Brande.” One of the uglies boosted Brande’s ego.
“I thought so.” She smirked.
Peeking through the peephole at these girls I didn’t even realize they were all light skin. Come to think of it, Makayla is the darkest in their group, but she’s the most beautiful. I’m not just saying that because she’s my sister.
Colorism was a problem at my school, and it divided a lot of us! I hated it. We are all black! We should be united! One thing was for certain though; this bitch was jealous of my sister! Wow and she thinks these hoes are her friends. I flushed the toilet and walked out the bathroom stall. They all gasped when they saw me except Brande.
“You think she heard you?” The Alicia girl whispered.
Brande crossed her arms, “If she did hear me, too bad. Kayla doesn’t like her anyways. She told me your dad cheated on your mom every time he visited Makayla in Seattle.”
I’m not going to lie that shit stung. I never knew my dad to cheat on my mom until learning of Makayla’s existence. I was still dealing with it all. So, for Makayla to tell strangers my family’s personal business was a low blow. What if she was right and our dad had an ongoing affair with Makayla’s mom? She was still my sister and loyalty was all I knew. I would defend her now and beat her ass later.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about you dirty ho. Did you make sure to tell Mike you’re not done taking the pills to cure your gonorrhea? You can affect him, but not my sister with that shit. I’m telling her!”
Brande’s mom and my aunt are best friends. I overheard my aunt telling my mom, and now I’m telling all her friends, and I’ll spread it to the whole school too!
“Who told you that!?” Brande started turning red. She quickly caught herself and folded her arms. “You’re still a fucking liar, you little virgin.”
I swear bitches can’t let go of shit! There was this pregnancy pact...
| Erscheint lt. Verlag | 17.11.2020 |
|---|---|
| Sprache | englisch |
| Themenwelt | Literatur ► Lyrik / Dramatik ► Dramatik / Theater |
| ISBN-10 | 1-0983-4346-8 / 1098343468 |
| ISBN-13 | 978-1-0983-4346-0 / 9781098343460 |
| Haben Sie eine Frage zum Produkt? |
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